? for working moms

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2006
? for working moms
2696
Mon, 03-03-2008 - 11:08am

My son is six months old, and I have been back to work full time for four weeks.

I became upset over the weekend when two people (who are very close to me) made comments such as: "it seems like it would be so much easier to drop your kids off at daycare and work full time than to stay home", and even worse, "it's clearly easier to work and have someone else raise your kids than stay home". Both were stated by mothers who have never been in the position of working full-time with children. I disagree thoroughly with both comments (my life is certainly NOT easier now that I'm back to work!)

So... without stiring up the hornet's nest that is the "mommy war"... I am curious, how can I respond to statements like this? Should I respond, or just let it go? How long does it take to get over hearing hurtful things like this?

Any thoughts are appreciated!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2007
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 2:18pm

So, again.....What's your point?


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Ducky

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 2:19pm
Either way, it's a loss, one greater than the other.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2005
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 2:21pm
Maybe it's a generational thing, or maybe a geographic thing, but I spent my childhood watching many grownups allow that pride in a home, a lifestyle, or material items to ruin them. I take pride in the fact that I will do whatever it takes to keep my family afloat, and that I will always put our future ahead of our pride in any material item or possession, including house or car. I take a great deal of pride in the fact that we found creative solutions, including downgrading or downsizing in some aspects of our lives, without regard to what anyone else thought of those decisions, and that those solutions have, in fact, put us in a much better financial position than we would've otherwise had. I am not saying that pride in your home or lifestyle or material items is a bad thing--I do take pride in those things. I am only saying that I take more pride in the ability to keep it all in perspective.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 2:22pm

Not sure of the exact wording of every exit on the LIE but I don't know why this one would have been picked if you have family or friends on the island and know the area and know Wyandanch.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 2:23pm

Just so you know, you are the one bringing up Ducky...again.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2000
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 2:23pm
So...if you sold your home, would you tell people that you'd lost it?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 2:24pm
????? IME homeownership is very important and people save up for many years to achieve it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2007
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 2:24pm

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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Ducky

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 2:25pm

<>


Are you joking or serious?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2002
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 2:26pm

"Are you contending that apartment living is superior to home-ownership when children enter the picture? "

Isn't that a matter of preference? I, personally, would much prefer to have an apartment near the town center, and I don't particularly care whether I own or rent. Dh, otoh, has always been determined to own a house somewhere out in the countryside. So we own a house that is located reasonably near the town center. It's not near enough for my taste, and I would still prefer an apartment, but compromise is important in a marriage :-).

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