? for working moms

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2006
? for working moms
2696
Mon, 03-03-2008 - 11:08am

My son is six months old, and I have been back to work full time for four weeks.

I became upset over the weekend when two people (who are very close to me) made comments such as: "it seems like it would be so much easier to drop your kids off at daycare and work full time than to stay home", and even worse, "it's clearly easier to work and have someone else raise your kids than stay home". Both were stated by mothers who have never been in the position of working full-time with children. I disagree thoroughly with both comments (my life is certainly NOT easier now that I'm back to work!)

So... without stiring up the hornet's nest that is the "mommy war"... I am curious, how can I respond to statements like this? Should I respond, or just let it go? How long does it take to get over hearing hurtful things like this?

Any thoughts are appreciated!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2002
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 5:21pm
I was confused because you seemed to be stressing the fact that you would no longer have child care costs once your child entered kindergarten. Apparently, though, you would still have child care costs.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 5:22pm
My mom would be willing to watch Samantha every day. If we had three or four kids or more, she probably wouldn't be too keen on the idea though.
baby in clothes basket
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2007
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 5:29pm

I think that rlgl thinks that she can just take the summer off, sah, live off of her u/e and life will just be peachy.

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Ducky

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2007
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 5:40pm

For several months?

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Ducky

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 5:42pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2004
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 5:43pm

I agree 110% with your post!


I have to be honest, I hate even asking friends/family to watch my kids for a couple hours just to go to dinner with DH, let alone asking them for any large length of time.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2007
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 5:45pm

How long would your savings last?


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Ducky

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2007
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 5:46pm

I thought you said in a previous post that the reason you carry the insurance is b/c it's more expensive through dh.


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Ducky

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2007
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 5:48pm

We have life insurance already on the side that we would be able to pay for while I was out of work.


I thought you said this was taken out of your check.


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Ducky

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Tue, 03-25-2008 - 5:49pm

If I lost my job, it would probably be pretty darn hard for me to afford daycare. It wouldn't be that I just didn't feel like paying for it. She is going to providing close to full time child care for my nephew starting next fall. For free. Probably for several years.

There are lots of people around here have mothers, sisters, aunts, and cousins who SAH and watch their grandkids (nieces, nephews, cousins, etc.) for little or no money. Especially if the parent(s) are down on their luck and can't afford decent daycare. It's pretty common.

baby in clothes basket

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