? for working moms

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2006
? for working moms
2696
Mon, 03-03-2008 - 11:08am

My son is six months old, and I have been back to work full time for four weeks.

I became upset over the weekend when two people (who are very close to me) made comments such as: "it seems like it would be so much easier to drop your kids off at daycare and work full time than to stay home", and even worse, "it's clearly easier to work and have someone else raise your kids than stay home". Both were stated by mothers who have never been in the position of working full-time with children. I disagree thoroughly with both comments (my life is certainly NOT easier now that I'm back to work!)

So... without stiring up the hornet's nest that is the "mommy war"... I am curious, how can I respond to statements like this? Should I respond, or just let it go? How long does it take to get over hearing hurtful things like this?

Any thoughts are appreciated!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Wed, 03-26-2008 - 8:25am
Me:
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Wed, 03-26-2008 - 8:25am
Good for you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 03-26-2008 - 8:36am

"There are lots of people around here have mothers, sisters, aunts, and cousins who SAH and watch their grandkids (nieces, nephews, cousins, etc.) for little or no money. Especially if the parent(s) are down on their luck and can't afford decent daycare. It's pretty common."


My MIL watches my nieces two days a week.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 03-26-2008 - 8:50am
I'm a mean mom...I don't allow my ILs to have different rules for my kids while my kids are with the ILs!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Wed, 03-26-2008 - 8:54am
I agree somewhat. My mom and MIL babysit fairly frequently for us right now-- 3-4 hours a week or so. When DH goes back to work full time, I plan to use professional child care. Not so much because my mom wouldn't do a wonderful job or wouldn't follow our instructions, but because I don't want to take advantage of her.
baby in clothes basket
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Wed, 03-26-2008 - 8:56am
No, that is called good friendship and love for people to help you in your time of need. If I was available to do so for a friend or family, I would not hesitate to help them. I help out my friend and sister when they need to work or have to go someplace and in turn they help me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2004
Wed, 03-26-2008 - 9:00am

"I would, however, watch someone else's child for free if I were in a position to do so.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Wed, 03-26-2008 - 9:00am
I guess I have had more experience with some things more than others-shrug :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Wed, 03-26-2008 - 9:01am
Yeah, I thought that question was quite odd!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Wed, 03-26-2008 - 9:02am
Absolutely!!! We did very well with our taxes this year and we were able to start a nice nest egg!!

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