? for working moms

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2006
? for working moms
2696
Mon, 03-03-2008 - 11:08am

My son is six months old, and I have been back to work full time for four weeks.

I became upset over the weekend when two people (who are very close to me) made comments such as: "it seems like it would be so much easier to drop your kids off at daycare and work full time than to stay home", and even worse, "it's clearly easier to work and have someone else raise your kids than stay home". Both were stated by mothers who have never been in the position of working full-time with children. I disagree thoroughly with both comments (my life is certainly NOT easier now that I'm back to work!)

So... without stiring up the hornet's nest that is the "mommy war"... I am curious, how can I respond to statements like this? Should I respond, or just let it go? How long does it take to get over hearing hurtful things like this?

Any thoughts are appreciated!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2001
Fri, 03-07-2008 - 10:01pm

Dr. Laura wrote an editorial about how that show is "killing families" and "mommies should be at home with their babies & nurturing the house!"

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2003
Fri, 03-07-2008 - 10:01pm

<"yeah, working 40 hours a week, plus commuting, plus doing that second shift of being a mommy, pumping, breastfeeding, laundry, cooking, cleaning, all of course without the benefit of nap time (cuz I'm working during nap time).

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2001
Fri, 03-07-2008 - 10:03pm

My (male) coworker just told my (male) boss that he and his wife had horribly "spoiled" their daughter by having the mom breastfeeding her for just over 2 years.


Apparently in the Chinese culture, anything more than 6 mos is spoiling.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2001
Fri, 03-07-2008 - 10:05pm

I used an empty office, and washed the stuff out in the lunchroom sink.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2001
Sat, 03-08-2008 - 11:17am

It is stressful.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Sat, 03-08-2008 - 1:12pm

I've done it for so long that the working part isn't really "stressful" at all -- and it really wasn't when they were little either.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 03-09-2008 - 12:48pm
It's more stressful being around your kids 24/7, to me.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2007
Sun, 03-09-2008 - 2:06pm
Me too.
Avatar for myshkamouse
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 03-09-2008 - 6:33pm
Its just really busy. I find right now, with full time work, and breast feeding (pumping while at work) its alott. I remember it was alott with the twins too but they were 14 months by time I went back full time. This guy was 3 months (now 4 months). That said, I don't think its stressful, just busy.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Sun, 03-09-2008 - 7:00pm

For me, woh is way less stressful than wah with Dylan. At least, when I'm at work, no one is talking at me. I'm so grateful for the after school care staff.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

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