? for working moms

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2006
? for working moms
2696
Mon, 03-03-2008 - 11:08am

My son is six months old, and I have been back to work full time for four weeks.

I became upset over the weekend when two people (who are very close to me) made comments such as: "it seems like it would be so much easier to drop your kids off at daycare and work full time than to stay home", and even worse, "it's clearly easier to work and have someone else raise your kids than stay home". Both were stated by mothers who have never been in the position of working full-time with children. I disagree thoroughly with both comments (my life is certainly NOT easier now that I'm back to work!)

So... without stiring up the hornet's nest that is the "mommy war"... I am curious, how can I respond to statements like this? Should I respond, or just let it go? How long does it take to get over hearing hurtful things like this?

Any thoughts are appreciated!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 03-21-2008 - 2:28pm

You know what?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Fri, 03-21-2008 - 2:30pm

I could care less if someone puts 20 people in one apt. if that is what they choose to do.

IME there are not many familes (especially that large) that would willingly go into a space that small.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Fri, 03-21-2008 - 2:32pm
I was speaking of the op'ers who said they live in the same small space. They are comparing apples to oranges.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Fri, 03-21-2008 - 2:36pm
Well if you have grown out of your home, you move. You do not have to go someplace that is huge and you can not afford the bills.
My neighbor was in this situation. She has the same size home as myself but with an apt in her basement. There were 6 people living in a 4 bedroom home. They choose to sell the house and go into a 5 bedroom home with an apt in it. They did not have a ton of money but they found a way to get extra space.
Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 03-21-2008 - 2:38pm

as usual the point went flying by you -- my POINT was that home ownership does not guarantee space...that many apartments are in fact bigger than some small homes and certainly many condos...so the broader argument that people who have kids shouldn't live in condos was what I was rebutting 1) b/c it's a ridiculous statement and 2) many apartments are larger than some homes so you can't make that comparison.

 

Yes. We. Did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 03-21-2008 - 2:41pm

Nope...you specifically stated <<We have 4 people in a 3 bedroom house but I could not imagine having 3 kids in one bedroom and then 2 in another and not feeling cramped. >>

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 03-21-2008 - 2:44pm

Have you missed the multiple posts about the fact that they have been looking for a house that fits their needs and budget, but haven't found one that they like?


How many square feet do you have for four people?

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2005
Fri, 03-21-2008 - 2:46pm

<>

Last I checked, moving someplace bigger costs more money. If you can't allocate more money to housing, whether or not you have outgrown it, well then there's no discussion.

Renaissance Siggy



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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Fri, 03-21-2008 - 2:49pm
While my home is not large at about 1,100 sq. ft., we have very large bedrooms (compared to many others in my area) and a full size basement. We also have a garage and backyard. We have plenty of room as we have many storage places.
Avatar for mkatherine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 03-21-2008 - 2:51pm

how do you know Ducky doesnt' have large bedrooms in her apartment? HOw do you know they don't feel very comfortable there?


more importantly WHY DO YOU CARE?????

"If gay Americans are not allowed to get married and have all the benefits that American citizens are entitled to by the Bill of Rights, they should get one hell of a tax break. That is my opinion,"

- Jeane "Dear Abby" Phillips, in an interview with Lisa Leff.

 

Yes. We. Did.

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