? for working moms

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2006
? for working moms
2696
Mon, 03-03-2008 - 11:08am

My son is six months old, and I have been back to work full time for four weeks.

I became upset over the weekend when two people (who are very close to me) made comments such as: "it seems like it would be so much easier to drop your kids off at daycare and work full time than to stay home", and even worse, "it's clearly easier to work and have someone else raise your kids than stay home". Both were stated by mothers who have never been in the position of working full-time with children. I disagree thoroughly with both comments (my life is certainly NOT easier now that I'm back to work!)

So... without stiring up the hornet's nest that is the "mommy war"... I am curious, how can I respond to statements like this? Should I respond, or just let it go? How long does it take to get over hearing hurtful things like this?

Any thoughts are appreciated!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 03-23-2008 - 9:28am
You don't know why you do not have a mortgage?
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2007
Sun, 03-23-2008 - 11:26am

The ex and his wife bought a home they weren't looking for after agreeing to go look at it to humor an family friend who'd been nagging them to go see it for weeks.

They were completely NOT looking to move. At all. No thought of it at all. But the friend had been on their case for weeks to come see it so they finally did thinking once they saw it, she'd leave them alone.

They put a contract on it 3 days after looking at it. It's about 25 miles farther from both their jobs--far enough away, in fact that when they moved, John moved out of their house and moved back in with me (he'd been living with them after high school graduation because their former house was only 5 minutes from his job and mine is 15 minutes). They signed the contract on December 18, and closed at the end of January the next year.

Seriously, if there's such a thing as an impulse buy wrt housing, this was it. But I have to say, I fully agree with their decision (other than now they're a good bit farther away from me than they were and I kind of miss that--they used to visit me more, and now they rarely do because I'm far less on their ways to/from things than I used to be--most of our visiting is me going there, but I'm not the one with young kids, so there's that, too). But the house was built in 1966 and has tons of character and charm that their mini-McMansion never really had. And the layout of it actually makes it seem much larger than the other house, even though it's nearly 1000 sq ft smaller.

Also, their mortgage is smaller than with the other house and they like their neighborhood and their neighbors MUCH more than in the other neighborhood. And the neighborhood seems to be MUCH more stable than their old one--lots less of people moving in and out, so the neighbors seem to be closer.

I kinda hate that they moved, like I said, cuz I miss them, but it was definitely a wise move for them and I love the house. It's a much better home for them than the other one (and I really liked the other one, too.)

~~~~~~~~~

Kitty

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Kitty

"BTW, I hate Lifetime. Their movies will suck you in and all of a sudden you've watched 3 in a row, used every tissue in t

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-08-2006
Sun, 03-23-2008 - 11:46am

nah, you're not that unusual, LOL!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2005
Sun, 03-23-2008 - 12:48pm

<>

Hey, my parents did that, too! It seriously increased the living space of the home. Between the huge "new" family room and the unusually large backyard, it was a wonderland.

Renaissance Siggy



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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Sun, 03-23-2008 - 4:17pm
Did she own the condo? Can I ask why she would go from homeownership to renting if that is what she did?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Sun, 03-23-2008 - 4:20pm

They sold in the time of the highest prices. They waited 3 years in between both homes and made good money so the mortgages were the same.


They actually moved down the street the 1st time to a brand, new bigger home. The 2nd time they moved to an area by the water.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Sun, 03-23-2008 - 4:21pm
You must be speaking about someone else because I do not know anyone who flips houses for a living. Sorry.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Sun, 03-23-2008 - 4:23pm

I am pretty sure the dimensions of the apt. was the same as my house with one extra bathroom.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Sun, 03-23-2008 - 4:24pm
Well they moved right down the street the first time and then to an area by the water the 2nd time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Sun, 03-23-2008 - 4:27pm
Exactly and I know a few people who move into the same town because they want their kids to either stay in the same school or school district and they like their town but want/need something larger for their growing family.

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