? for working moms

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2006
? for working moms
2696
Mon, 03-03-2008 - 11:08am

My son is six months old, and I have been back to work full time for four weeks.

I became upset over the weekend when two people (who are very close to me) made comments such as: "it seems like it would be so much easier to drop your kids off at daycare and work full time than to stay home", and even worse, "it's clearly easier to work and have someone else raise your kids than stay home". Both were stated by mothers who have never been in the position of working full-time with children. I disagree thoroughly with both comments (my life is certainly NOT easier now that I'm back to work!)

So... without stiring up the hornet's nest that is the "mommy war"... I am curious, how can I respond to statements like this? Should I respond, or just let it go? How long does it take to get over hearing hurtful things like this?

Any thoughts are appreciated!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 11:56am

"Would you move out of your home NOW willingly and downsize to my size home with 2 kids?"


To avoid foreclosure and/or bankruptcy?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 11:57am
It is IME. Never said it was in "general".
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 11:58am
"Would you move out of your home NOW willingly and downsize to my size home with 2 kids?"

To avoid foreclosure and/or bankruptcy?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 12:02pm
Let's say that you can not make enough with a second job to be sure that you can avoid the foreclosure, then what?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 12:06pm

Refinance??


My last resort would be to move.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 12:06pm
And if you or your DH lost your job, would you consider moving to an apartment?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2007
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 12:07pm
We live in a diverse nation. Even though I live in a transient area, our street had less turnover than yours. We have been here 11 1/2 years. There are ten houses. Only four have sold since we moved here. 3 sold because the owners retired and moved to smaller houses (they had lived on our street 20-40+ years). One sold due to divorce. Of the four families that bought, two were first time owners, one family was relocating from Idaho and had to downsize due to the cots of living. Only one "moved up" from a townhouse further out. I think the moving inside the beltway was just as much a factor as moving to a larger house- for them.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 12:09pm
OK, but is it even remotely possible for you to imagine that many other people might approach this problem differently and that their choices are as valid as yours?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 12:10pm

No, as either of us can still pay the mortgage and the main bills until the other finds another job.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 03-24-2008 - 12:11pm

It really isn't always that simple.

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