Would you have had kids if you couldn't
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| Wed, 09-03-2003 - 3:31pm |
I guess I'm still astounded at the attitude that surfaced at another thread implying that if they couldn't pay for college, they wouldn't have had children. Of course, I'm a lazy, selfish mom at home who isn't working while some of my kids are in school so maybe my opinion doesn't count. Maybe I SHOULD take up scrapbooking to make my existence more worthwhile! lol
In any case, it is an interesting question considering that, under that reasoning, Oprah Winfrey shouldn't have been born. Give me time and I can come up with a whole list of highly successful and respected people who have impacted us in positive ways that wouldn't have been born had their parents decided that because they couldn't pay for college, they wouldn't have children.
How has the college issue influenced your decision to have children, if at all? Do you think it is an important criteria in the decision?
Cindy

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Yes and while you are talking to your children about how hard you have worked to make your marriage last, you have said that you consider young marriage as an option for your dd. I dont. My dd knows that if she wanted to get married at 18, we'd certainly support her (ultimately) but we wouldnt be dancing in the streets over it. I'd do my best to talk her out of it, get her to wait, and find out *WHY* she was in such a hurry!
You are to be commended for working so hard on your marriage. I dont think I ever once said otherwise. But again, I would NEVER EVER EVER recommend a teen marriage as a GOOD choice for my children.
dj
Dj
"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~
One can get a COLLEGE education while married, if they so choose. Even if I hadn't married at 18, I wouldn't have gone to college back then!
>>>Get some job experience so they can actually support a family?<<<
hmmmm...I could have supported my family at 18, and I DID have job experience. I had been working FT since I was 16 years old. Would we have lived the way we live today? Nope, but we would have survived, and would not have lived in poverty or on state assistance.
>>>Get a sense of what they want out of life and who they are?<<<
I very much had knowledge of what I wanted out of life, and I knew who I was very well.
Maybe you just don't get it b/c you weren't like me at 18, I don't know, but there seems to be no "meeting of the minds" here.
Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14
dj
Dj
"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~
Dj
"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~
Sure having one person to take care of instead of 2 makes it harder to be above the poverty line. I'm not stupid. But, as okmrs said, if she hadn't gotten married she wouldn't have gone to college anyway. She wouldn't have had what she does now. So her marrying actually INCREASED her standard of living and income.
<,A single person has choices and options->> Married people have options too.
<>
Again, you're lumping in uneducated 14yo unwed teen mothers with educated, 18yos with planned pregancies.
Hollie
Hey. . .I didn't say it was a 'good choice'. . .but a choice. . .I don't categorize choices for my kids, however. . .I try to teach them to make good (age appropriate) decisions so that they'll be able to make bigger decisions when the time comes.
S.V.
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