Would you have had kids if you couldn't

Avatar for cindytree
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Would you have had kids if you couldn't
1589
Wed, 09-03-2003 - 3:31pm
Would you still have had children if you knew you might not be able to pay for their college education? I'm not talking about providing food and shelter and needs of minor children and paying bills in general. Just about paying their way through college.

I guess I'm still astounded at the attitude that surfaced at another thread implying that if they couldn't pay for college, they wouldn't have had children. Of course, I'm a lazy, selfish mom at home who isn't working while some of my kids are in school so maybe my opinion doesn't count. Maybe I SHOULD take up scrapbooking to make my existence more worthwhile! lol

In any case, it is an interesting question considering that, under that reasoning, Oprah Winfrey shouldn't have been born. Give me time and I can come up with a whole list of highly successful and respected people who have impacted us in positive ways that wouldn't have been born had their parents decided that because they couldn't pay for college, they wouldn't have children.

How has the college issue influenced your decision to have children, if at all? Do you think it is an important criteria in the decision?

Cindy

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Avatar for virgogirl914
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sun, 09-07-2003 - 6:19pm
Ah, but the chance is there. . .rebellion is a bitch. . .

My husband is "academically inclined, very bright," and his parents assumed he was headed for college.

He went against their expectations and enlisted.

And NO, he didn't come from a 'low SES' family.

We both came from quite middle class immediate families. . .with his parents having done a better job of investing than mine did.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Sun, 09-07-2003 - 6:20pm
Oh please do, I'm fascinated. Don't forget though, that was 20 years ago, the town has changed a LOT since then, and I'm not sure that change has been for the better. It's changed a LOT since we moved here 11 years ago.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Sun, 09-07-2003 - 6:23pm
OK, but humor me for a bit, and be honest. Did any of his friends enlist? Could it have been peer pressure, or him just wanting to do what his buddies were doing?
Avatar for virgogirl914
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sun, 09-07-2003 - 6:30pm
Um, nope. . .most of his affluent friends in HS did go to college. . .and promptly flunked out.

It was definitly NOT peer pressure.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 09-07-2003 - 6:40pm
Well, if islim's example is anything to go by, they suck at math and can't conduct even the most basic sort of research....or even comprehend how to access resources cited by others.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 09-07-2003 - 6:47pm
Actually, it was closer to 30 years ago. Geez, I assumed you were a native, the way you claim such an ownership of the place. I figured you were defending your heritage or something. Interesting.

Susan

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 09-07-2003 - 7:04pm
LOL...as if your dh has made a CAREER out of the military based on peer pressure from enlisting with his high school buddies....Someone enlisting out of peer pressure is lucky to make it successfully through basic training, let along turn an enlistment into a career as your dh has done.

I, too, was the only one in my group of friends who enlisted. My best friend went on to college, got a degree in Archeology/Anthropology with a minor in English worked for a while at a Lane Bryant in Phoenix and then moved into a commune community in some mountain area, where the cabins have no electricity and the community shares a water pump. Ostensibly she's writing the 'great American novel', but that was more than 10 years ago and she's long since stopped answering letters, so who knows.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 09-07-2003 - 7:10pm
It tells me that you've finally actually read the sites others have referenced here, but that you haven't done a very good job of it, because although the first reported year is a lower percentage than the last reported year, the slice (7 years) is so small and the results so varied from one year to another, it's not very accurate to suggest there's a "trend" in any real sense of the term. At least not in a mathematical or statistical context.
Avatar for virgogirl914
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Sun, 09-07-2003 - 7:22pm
Oh, but really. . .he hasn't made a career out of the military. . .he just has an occupation. . .at least according to some here.

The officers. . .they have the 'real' careers.

Oh, if they only knew.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
Sun, 09-07-2003 - 8:11pm
What about his non-affluent friends? Or didn't he have any. I thought you sid he was middle class?

Wow, all his friends promptly flunked out of college? What are the odds of THAT?

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