Would you have had kids if you couldn't

Avatar for cindytree
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Registered: 03-28-2003
Would you have had kids if you couldn't
1589
Wed, 09-03-2003 - 3:31pm
Would you still have had children if you knew you might not be able to pay for their college education? I'm not talking about providing food and shelter and needs of minor children and paying bills in general. Just about paying their way through college.

I guess I'm still astounded at the attitude that surfaced at another thread implying that if they couldn't pay for college, they wouldn't have had children. Of course, I'm a lazy, selfish mom at home who isn't working while some of my kids are in school so maybe my opinion doesn't count. Maybe I SHOULD take up scrapbooking to make my existence more worthwhile! lol

In any case, it is an interesting question considering that, under that reasoning, Oprah Winfrey shouldn't have been born. Give me time and I can come up with a whole list of highly successful and respected people who have impacted us in positive ways that wouldn't have been born had their parents decided that because they couldn't pay for college, they wouldn't have children.

How has the college issue influenced your decision to have children, if at all? Do you think it is an important criteria in the decision?

Cindy

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 09-08-2003 - 10:14pm
Maybe it's one those "suggestions" that's like on the Sopranos. LOL
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Tue, 09-09-2003 - 4:32am
<<<<
I also agree that college isn't for everyone, but it is for everyone in my family.>>>>

I hope it's sarcasm I hear, and not an actual fact. My reasoning, I would absolutely love to see you "force" an Adult (college = 18+) to do something only "you" want.

Your "assuredness" really astounds me. My parents didn't make it afactor, however, by the time both my brother and I got to "college".. My dad tried to force my brother to go.. Yeah Right, I want to see you do it better then him.

<>

Apparently you aren't aware of how much she has changed children's lives. Nor are you aware of her help to those who are needy.. There is many people who would have otherwise died had she not been here.

TwinMom

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Tue, 09-09-2003 - 4:42am
<<>>

That right there is a college education. And while i am not god, I think it's unfair that "you" would dictate who can and who cannot have a child. While my mother doesn't know diddley SQUAT about Algebra and it's practical applications, or even MATH for that matter, she was/is a wonderful woman. So is my father, and i resent the fact that under YOUR standards my parents wouldn't have been able to have kids.

That is totaly selfish. Gah you think Jesus would preach that?

No offense, but it's reasoning like that, that keeps alot of people from ever obtaining their full potential.

TwinsMom

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Tue, 09-09-2003 - 4:55am
<<<<>>>

INTERESTING NOTION!!!! OMG, um.. let me ask you something, What would you have done had you had OH say TWINS??? Er what about TRIPPLETS?? Would you have aborted it? Makes you wonder if you can control that and then some.

Christ's sake, if I thought of all of what your saying when I was TRYING to have kids, I would have given up before I ever got pregnant. AND let me add here.. It was a MIRICLE I got pregnant and TWINS to boot.

So, yeah, what would you have done had your ds ended up with TWIN siblings??? Hmm

TwinsMom

ps. NO it was not fertility drugs that got me my twins. I was completely natural, and when I least expected it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Tue, 09-09-2003 - 4:58am
<<>>

Well, what was that old adage, usually "god" if you believe in him LOVES to give you BUNDLES of surprizes when you least expect them. Other people who spend YEARS trying to "plan" their bundles, usually don't get pregnant until "after" they stop trying.

See, murphies law just absolutely loves to mess up even the best well laid plans..

It's b/c of this that we have alot of the laws, and mandates we have now.

Think about it.

TwinsMom

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Tue, 09-09-2003 - 5:13am
Curve balls, are the norm in my life.. I wasn't finacially ready, however I set it a goal to become that way.. But guess what?

Divorce. Yep that nasty little word.. and from there, my life has basically gone down hill.. I fell down the stairs and now i can't work. I don't get childsupport b/c when they did the calculation I WAS working. And they won't change it now.

Now, tell me, Am I irresponsible b/c I can't support my kids on my own? I didn't do it to myself.. Lawyers = TEN TONS more money then I have. They get every penny extra I got. I didn't do it on purpose, I SURE as hell didn't put MYSELF in this situation.

But yeah, I planned my kids, Yeah I planned to put them in poverty. Thanks for making me feel like cr@p.

TwinsMom

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Tue, 09-09-2003 - 5:14am
THANK YOU!!!!! (((huggles)))

TwinsMom

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Tue, 09-09-2003 - 5:30am
You know.. You break my heart.. You really do, You have no clue of what you speak.

MOST Of the time Lady KIDS don't come when they are NEEDED.. DUH..

That's the wonderful world of "education" and knowing when and when not to use birthcontrol. OH but WAIT.. I got pregnant on birthcontrol.... Damn that logic didn't work either..

Hmmm guess you think ALL BABIES every where are PLANNED!!! Wrong again..

Say something intelligent please.. I need to hear it.

TwinsMom

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Tue, 09-09-2003 - 5:33am
er yeah, like there IS a drug out there that's 100% proof.. hahahahaha

You make me laugh.

TwinsMom

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Tue, 09-09-2003 - 5:36am
You know what's funny??

18 is legal age of an adult, and she can leave and elope.. WOOOOhh she is married..

Guess your 6ft under now eh?

ALOT can happen in 18 yrs. Better not plan too far ahead. You might.. nvm.. you get the idea.

TwinsMom

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