Would you have had kids if you couldn't
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| Wed, 09-03-2003 - 3:31pm |
I guess I'm still astounded at the attitude that surfaced at another thread implying that if they couldn't pay for college, they wouldn't have had children. Of course, I'm a lazy, selfish mom at home who isn't working while some of my kids are in school so maybe my opinion doesn't count. Maybe I SHOULD take up scrapbooking to make my existence more worthwhile! lol
In any case, it is an interesting question considering that, under that reasoning, Oprah Winfrey shouldn't have been born. Give me time and I can come up with a whole list of highly successful and respected people who have impacted us in positive ways that wouldn't have been born had their parents decided that because they couldn't pay for college, they wouldn't have children.
How has the college issue influenced your decision to have children, if at all? Do you think it is an important criteria in the decision?
Cindy

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She and I both got BAs about the same time. Both got MAs about the same time. She went to work in personnel and is now an academic advisor at a small college in the state she chose to live in. Works on a ten month contract and travels the world all summer with her DH. All three kids are out of the house and she's a free woman.
I go on to get a PhD, so I travel the world, do glamourous research, but don't meet my husband until I am in my 30s, we have kids right away, and I work as a professor in a medium sized college in a state I wouldn't have chosen but have learned to appreciate. I'm on a ten month contract and spend the summers driving between baseball games and basketball practices.
She looks at me and pities me for being "tied down" in what should be the "best" years of my life.
We're both fairly happy people.
I realize that getting pregnant isn't always a "deliberate" choice and in your situation you made a decision and it worked out wonderfully for you. However, if my kids want to get married before or during college just because they're in love (or a similar reason) I'll encourage them to wait until they're finished and a little older. I'd like to steer them down a less stressful path if I can.
On the other hand, I've done a lot of traveling myself, a lot before having kids, and a lot with my kids. I think being established prior to having them has enabled us to do so much more for and with the kids, like travel, etc.
Moving out of mom & dad's, going to college or getting a fulltime job, being responsible for your own finances - those are things that an average 18 year old does not do.
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