Advice: The big "talk"

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Advice: The big "talk"
1221
Sun, 02-18-2007 - 7:28am

Okay, I need advice on when people started or will start to have the big "talk" with their kids.

My oldest is going to be 9 next week. I have some friends telling me they already had this talk with their children at this age. She just seems so young to me. She still plays house, school and dolls with her little sister. IMO, telling her about sex is going to take some innocence away from her. But, am I sheltering her too much?

She knows about periods and body hair development. She already has little breats "bumps" (as she likes to call "em).

Agghhh..I really thought I had until she was 12 to have this talk like my mother did.

What is everyone's opinion?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Sat, 02-24-2007 - 9:23am
All tackiness is inappropriate, for kids and adults.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005
Sat, 02-24-2007 - 9:41am

"To me, dressing kids like kids simply means not like an adult or an adult wannabe."

That, as a definition of how to dress kids, makes absolutely no sense to me. Most adults around here wear jeans or casual khakis, t-shirts (long or short depending on the weather and usually with no logos) and/or sweaters. Most kids wear... jeans or casual khakis, t-shirts (long or short depending on the weather and usually with no logos) and/or sweaters. Is this wrong? Are kids being dressed as "adult wannabes" or too much like adults? Exactly what should kids wear instead of jeans, t-shirts etc.? Should kids be banned from wearing jeans because adults wear jeans?

To me, trying to say that kids should not be dressed like adults leads to far more complex questions than simply saying that kids should be dressed comfortably, practically and appropriately with regard to weather conditions. It seems to me that you are really trying to say that girls shouldn't dress like a certain faction of teens/young adults (e.g. in outfits most appropriate for MTV videos), but then those kinds of outfits have very little to do with how most adults in general dress themselves.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2006
Sat, 02-24-2007 - 10:38am
I don't have any objection to how you limit things for your own child. I just find it odd that since some parents let their kids have Elmo t-shirts or Barbie shoes, you find that tacky of the parents. I honest to goodness, cannot think of a reason to care. Things like belly shirts are inappropriate for children. Barbie shoes are not inappropriate, you just don't like the way they look.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2006
Sat, 02-24-2007 - 10:40am
Can you honestly say you don't see how your post could be considered rude? Honestly?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2006
Sat, 02-24-2007 - 10:41am
It's a pretty clear inference my dear. I'm sorry that you can't see it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2006
Sat, 02-24-2007 - 10:43am
I don't see how this contradicts my post. You were just offering up things that you consider "tacky" that aren't tacky. They are inappropriate. Somehow you seem to think you are able to talk down because you have this idea that any of us would allow high heels, or short skirts, or slutty slogans on our daughters. I'm afraid you are sadly mistaken.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2006
Sat, 02-24-2007 - 10:45am
No it isn't. Just because an adult is wearing a tacky combination of outdated styles and obnoxious colors does not make it inappropriate. Inappropriate and tacky mean two totally different things.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Sat, 02-24-2007 - 11:23am
Please refer to #280 and to #204.


Edited 2/24/2007 12:02 pm ET by sabinamarianne
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Sat, 02-24-2007 - 11:24am
But to me, tacky *is* inappropriate.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Sat, 02-24-2007 - 11:25am
I actually have no idea what any of you other than jca would let her dd wear.

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