Advice: The big "talk"
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Advice: The big "talk"
| Sun, 02-18-2007 - 7:28am |
Okay, I need advice on when people started or will start to have the big "talk" with their kids.
My oldest is going to be 9 next week. I have some friends telling me they already had this talk with their children at this age. She just seems so young to me. She still plays house, school and dolls with her little sister. IMO, telling her about sex is going to take some innocence away from her. But, am I sheltering her too much?
She knows about periods and body hair development. She already has little breats "bumps" (as she likes to call "em).
Agghhh..I really thought I had until she was 12 to have this talk like my mother did.
What is everyone's opinion?

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Edited 2/24/2007 12:55 pm ET by lindamom3kidlets
Have you never been to a place popular with young girls and seen some dressed inappropriately? That's what I mean by inappropriate, nothing more complicated than that.
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Most of us know this when we see it on a young girl. It's a matter of degree, and to some extent a matter of context, too. But it's not complicated, imo.
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I sometimes wear sexy clothes, although I'm neither a hooker nor an entertainer. Tonight I'm going to a party. I'm wearing a black, low cut party dress with very little back. It has sequins on top and fringes at the hem. I'll be appropriately dressed, but if my dd14 wore it, she might not be. Simple, imo.
Yes, which is fine, but you asked why I would notice. I notice, and I do not assume the kid has bad taste, because the kid is too young to have a clue. So, I guess the parents must have bad taste, but you are right, they might also simply not care at all.
So, the real question is why I care what my kid wears. I care because, to me, it is part of teaching her. At the same time, I do not expect to control her every move or police whatever she chooses to wear on a certain day. Nor do I think such a level of control would be a good idea. The solution I chose was to control the "raw material" and leave it up to her from there.
No, actually, I asked why you care, not why you notice.
>>So, I guess the parents must have bad taste, but you are right, they might also simply not care at all.<<
Ahh, so regardless of the actual taste level of the parents, they MUST have bad taste if they allow their children to dress in what you don't like. See, the way I view it, it seems that they either have bad taste OR they don't care.
>>I do not expect to control her every move or police whatever she chooses to wear on a certain day. Nor do I think such a level of control would be a good idea.<<
Yes, but you do realize that your list of things that cannot be in the home in the first place is probably much longer than say, my list? I would not allow my child to wear high heels, (except those pretend plastic ones when playing dressup) belly shirts, spaghetti strap anything, short skirts, or anything provocative. But I see no reason to not allow Barbie shoes, or a ballerina costume, or a Dora t-shirt, as long as I'm conscious enough to dress her nicely for occasions that call for it. On the other hand, I think that there is a little more formality where you live as compared to where I live. So while you may not think that your "level of control" is very high, I obviously disagree.
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