Advice: The big "talk"
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Advice: The big "talk"
| Sun, 02-18-2007 - 7:28am |
Okay, I need advice on when people started or will start to have the big "talk" with their kids.
My oldest is going to be 9 next week. I have some friends telling me they already had this talk with their children at this age. She just seems so young to me. She still plays house, school and dolls with her little sister. IMO, telling her about sex is going to take some innocence away from her. But, am I sheltering her too much?
She knows about periods and body hair development. She already has little breats "bumps" (as she likes to call "em).
Agghhh..I really thought I had until she was 12 to have this talk like my mother did.
What is everyone's opinion?

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ROFLOL okay now I think I understand.
Since we're on the subthread topic of all things tacky/aesthetically challenged/cartoon character clad: what does everyone think of the new cast colors that orthopedic (sp?) specialists offer to children with broken limbs? Colored elastics offered by orthodontists? Cartoon print scrubs/labcoats for pediatric nurses & doctors & phlebotomists & dentists? Cartoon print "cough guards" (the paper masks w/ elastic to go over the ears) at the pediatrician's office for kids with a cough? Where does one draw the line on any or all of these?
Thanks ;)
DD & I were looking at photos from my childhood tonight and both the adults' & childrens' clothing reminded me of this thread.
It was like looking at a scale-model of all the fashion disasters of the 80's and 90's ~ (not in any chronological order) rainbow striped suspenders? "Get in shape girl" terry cloth headbands? mullet hair? huge shoulder pads? jelly shoes? hammer pants? Skidz? spiral perms? stretch colored jeans? Cross Colors? Fubu? Jnco? multiple pairs of shoelaces in shoes? LAGear sneakers? Debbie Gibson's Electric Youth "fragrance"? Layered socks? leggings with tunic tops or sweaters over them? OY!
I sort of guess I see what you are driving at, I think, only I do not see it as applying to me. All I do is infer things about other people based on their choices, in clothes, in food, in toys, whatever. I think most people do this to some extent. However, it does not mean that I judge them in any negative sense, or that I won't let my kid play with children who are allowed to wear barbie sneakers, if you see what I mean. Some of my friends thought that my standards were completely loopy, which is also fine. If it gives them a good laugh that is OK with me.
In fact, now that you are making me think about this, part of the point (to me) was to have a clear line at home, so that the kid COULD go and play with any and all kinds of kids, visit all kinds of homes, be friends with all different kinds of people and still have a sense of who she was herself. IOW, my ideas about these things never meant that dd was only hanging out with other little dweebs who wore pure wool sweaters and played with ecologically correct, German wood blocks (example only, we did not have any German wood blocks, lol).
I don't know if that answers your question.
Yes, I mentioned flat shoes. But for any particular parent to decide any particular pair of shoes in her dd's wardrobe are *not* flats, well, that's up to her, isn't it? For all I know, the shoes she has in mind might very well qualify as flats in my eyes or anyone else's. For example, a picture was posted of white ankle strap party shoes with what appears to be a 3/4" chunky heel; are they flats or not? Imo, yes, they're pretty much flats. Not to my taste or anything, but flats nonetheless.
Where to draw the line depends on whether or not you have opinions on these things and on whether you'd like to instill those opinions in your kids or enforce them on your kids.
Sometimes schools even have rules. My schools, for instance, have language in their Behavior Codes that refers vaguely to clothing items that draw undue attention, whatever that means.
From what I posted, there's actually no "premise that any pre-teen wearing something other than flat shoes (i.e. "heels") is sporting the bimbo look." There might, however, be the premise that shoes other than flat shoes might possibly be a component of a pre-teen bimbo look.
And of course any parent thinking about this immediately flashes on the various footwear in her dd's closet and wonders if they're the shoes in question. Wouldn't you agree that with some shoes, say, 2-inch heels, there's not much doubt as to their bimbo potential, while with other shoes, say, the ones posted in this thread, there could be some controversy?
I suspect there's an element here of parents maybe getting a bit touchy on this topic because in their heart of hearts, they wonder if their dd's wardrobes might from time to time include items that could be construed as bimbo-esque, even if they don't care to admit it to themselves. Just speculating here...
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