Advice: The big "talk"

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Advice: The big "talk"
1221
Sun, 02-18-2007 - 7:28am

Okay, I need advice on when people started or will start to have the big "talk" with their kids.

My oldest is going to be 9 next week. I have some friends telling me they already had this talk with their children at this age. She just seems so young to me. She still plays house, school and dolls with her little sister. IMO, telling her about sex is going to take some innocence away from her. But, am I sheltering her too much?

She knows about periods and body hair development. She already has little breats "bumps" (as she likes to call "em).

Agghhh..I really thought I had until she was 12 to have this talk like my mother did.

What is everyone's opinion?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Mon, 02-26-2007 - 8:44am
Right. That is why I asked for to post some links of what you find acceptable.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Mon, 02-26-2007 - 8:48am

Other people on here have asked for advice and did not get slammed for it. You are right though - I wouldn't ever ask for advice on here again. I thought since many of the posters here seem to be level-headed and I respect most of the opinions on this board, I could get some advice. Obivously, I was wrong. I already posted several times that I would not bother again.

I did not mind the questions or debating my POV - the slams on my parenting were on-called for and more than one poster agreed.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2004
Mon, 02-26-2007 - 8:48am
Yes thank you!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2004
Mon, 02-26-2007 - 8:50am
HA HA HAHA!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Mon, 02-26-2007 - 8:51am
What was "shocking" is that people (even after i explained numerous times) keep repeating ONE sentence that I stated over and over and over again. I exaplined what I meant by the sentence that since I was talking about my dd that I was not talking about all 9 y.o. Even after stating that, the same poster keeps repeating it in order to prove that she knows what I meant. That is what I found shocking especially who it came from.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2006
Mon, 02-26-2007 - 8:54am

And other people have posted here asking for advice and did get debated (which is what you were, you were debated not slammed). It was a chance that you took when you posted here.

You were not slammed for your parenting, you were debated on why you felt that way about that particular issue.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2004
Mon, 02-26-2007 - 8:58am

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Mon, 02-26-2007 - 9:00am

Yes, if you read all the posts, I was slammed. More the one poster agreed that I was put down for my parenting opinion about tampons. That is not debating. And, no, there have been threads in which people asked for advice and got it. So, no matter how many times you want to repeat the same thing, i am not going to agree. I know what was said to me and how I repeatedly responded.

Really, I want to stop debating this. It is ridiculous that it went this far and people can not let it drop. I divulged way more personal info thatn I am comfortable with (and considering the reponses I received I regret it even more).I do not care nor would I ask for advice/support or anything related to that again on this board.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2006
Mon, 02-26-2007 - 9:01am
I do agree that some posters do not let things drop and go on and on about subjects trying to the answer that they want. Which is why I try to follow the 3-4 reply rule. Once you have discussed something back and fourth 3-4 times that subject is pretty much as far as it will go. Anything after that is pretty much repeating what was already said. So once it gets to that point I stop my end of the debate, there is no reason to keep repeating the same thing over and over. Once I am out that debate stops.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2006
Mon, 02-26-2007 - 9:08am

"And, no, there have been threads in which people asked for advice and got it."

I never said any different. What I said was that there were also other posters who asked for advice and were debated. You were given advice from many, but you were also debated by a few.

"Really, I want to stop debating this."

Then do that, no one is forcing you to reply to their posts.

"It is ridiculous that it went this far and people can not let it drop."

You are part of that people. If once you explained yourself you stopped replying then this thread would have died a long time ago.

"I divulged way more personal info thatn I am comfortable with"

I agree. No one should ever divulge information that they do not want debated.

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