Advice: The big "talk"

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Advice: The big "talk"
1221
Sun, 02-18-2007 - 7:28am

Okay, I need advice on when people started or will start to have the big "talk" with their kids.

My oldest is going to be 9 next week. I have some friends telling me they already had this talk with their children at this age. She just seems so young to me. She still plays house, school and dolls with her little sister. IMO, telling her about sex is going to take some innocence away from her. But, am I sheltering her too much?

She knows about periods and body hair development. She already has little breats "bumps" (as she likes to call "em).

Agghhh..I really thought I had until she was 12 to have this talk like my mother did.

What is everyone's opinion?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 10:46am

I'm conservative, but not totally. I work with kids, and I find it helps me connect with them to wear things that are a little bright, a little playful sometimes. So, I do understand wanting to express oneself through clothing and appearance.

But wrt little girls, I'm focusing here on wanting to dress older than one's age. IME, girls want to stand out from the crowd in a way that looks hot. IOW, they're not so much interested in looking different for the sake of looking different as in looking glamorous and sophisticated before their years. That's what I like to discourage.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 11:32am

"I get joy out of seeing people wearing interesting things."


It just makes me feel uncomfortable for them, TBH.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 12:03pm

I used to live near a nature preserve-we had tons of fun, lol. We live out but in a fairly populated area. They can romp in fields and woods, but I know they're being watched by at least 1 other mom.

If my kids feet grew like yours I wouldn't hesitate to buy the better shoes either.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 12:06pm
It depends on the shoes. Some don't hold up as well as others, but most of them last about as long as needed. I don't buy dressy shoes for church very often. My dds wear sneakers 9 times out of 10 and they usually hold up for a season thereabouts. Sometimes they outgrow them before they wear out, though.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 12:06pm
My girls feet grow fast. The older one faster than my youngest. But, neither one has ever had a pair of shoes last more than one season.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 12:08pm
Not usually, and we rarely pass any down. However my dds have had hand-me-down Easter shoes. Why not? They've been worn once for about 2 hrs tops. My dds can only wear them one season, so why not pass them down to my niece? Those shoes can be expensive and they're usually only needed once a year, if that, in my family.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 12:11pm

I love having one practically in our back yard! Summer is one long season of hunting wild blueberries and strawberries, chasing down ant hills and trying to catch a glimpse of deer and elk :-).

My kids hate to shop for shoes, so shoes that really last for a long time is what works best for us.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 12:13pm

Those baggy pants first became the style when I was in high school. All I can remember is the many boys who were "pantsed" in the hallways.

On that particular subject though, I'll go with baggy but no undergarments showing and I totally veto the plumbers crack and writing on the butt. Seriously I've seen women and girls get peeved at people checking out their butt-so why write on it?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 12:14pm
I think Sild had more in mind shoes that had been worn quite frequently. I think it makes a lot of sense to pass down shoes that have only been briefly worn for a special occasion.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2003
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 12:15pm
Thats the one pair I probably wouldn't buy, lol, because it would match nothing. I don't care so much about conservative, but I care a lot about practicality. However, one dd has an entire wardrobe of various shades of pink so I might very well find myself buying them one day.

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