Advice: The big "talk"

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Advice: The big "talk"
1221
Sun, 02-18-2007 - 7:28am

Okay, I need advice on when people started or will start to have the big "talk" with their kids.

My oldest is going to be 9 next week. I have some friends telling me they already had this talk with their children at this age. She just seems so young to me. She still plays house, school and dolls with her little sister. IMO, telling her about sex is going to take some innocence away from her. But, am I sheltering her too much?

She knows about periods and body hair development. She already has little breats "bumps" (as she likes to call "em).

Agghhh..I really thought I had until she was 12 to have this talk like my mother did.

What is everyone's opinion?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 5:47pm

I already acknowledged somewhere that to me part of this is a matter of teaching basic, basic aesthetics to the poor kid. However, the pink shoes are also a matter of aping adult mores and styles and I do not like that.

BTW, as an aside, I showed dd the list of the shoes I did not like. She is 9th grade, 14 years old, and she told me that no girls her age would wear heels, except "really, really, really, really cheapo people." As for the pink ones, she explained to me that anyone wearing those would simply look a fool. The flat musketeer boots she recognized as something the more ditzy girls might wear to a school dance.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 5:53pm
They wouldn't wear heels to a dance or other formalish affair? 9th grade prom? A wedding?


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 5:57pm
For a child? For a 9, 10 or 12yo to aim for?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 6:07pm
No, no proms, btw, just informal dances arranged by the kids.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 6:07pm
The designer is Manolo and the shoes are classic for the most part, just expensive and high heeled. Here you can see examples: http://www.style.com/manolo/home_flash.html Some of those I would never wear anywhere public, but "carmine," "nolita" and "sizzle" are classic shoes.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2007
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 6:15pm

*nodding*

(don't get your hopes up, this probably won't happen again! lol)

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2004
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 6:33pm
Yeah, IKWYM. With bright shoes, the rest of your outfit has to be pretty low key.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 8:24pm
thanks for the link. those are pretty but something i could never wear in public,either......i would fear falling out of them,breaking my ankle or something. my anxieties are tortured,enough!! :)

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2004
Tue, 02-27-2007 - 10:24pm

My dd dated a boy who fell into the goth category. He and his friends seemed to believe that they were somehow "deeper" than the rest of the kids. My dd didn't date him for very long, she found him to be quite a downer, lol.

Robin

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2006
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 2:15am
OMG. My boyfriend's friend's girlfriend (got all that, lol) has shoes that look just like that! I thought they were ugly on an adult. On a child it's just awful!!

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