Advice: The big "talk"

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Advice: The big "talk"
1221
Sun, 02-18-2007 - 7:28am

Okay, I need advice on when people started or will start to have the big "talk" with their kids.

My oldest is going to be 9 next week. I have some friends telling me they already had this talk with their children at this age. She just seems so young to me. She still plays house, school and dolls with her little sister. IMO, telling her about sex is going to take some innocence away from her. But, am I sheltering her too much?

She knows about periods and body hair development. She already has little breats "bumps" (as she likes to call "em).

Agghhh..I really thought I had until she was 12 to have this talk like my mother did.

What is everyone's opinion?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 5:54pm
They shouldn't. Just like Greek culture shouldn't apply to me and my dd.


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2006
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 5:55pm
Being a bit of a devil's advocate here but... along that vein, isn't scented soap, moisturizer, or perfume the same thing?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 5:55pm

Amazing that some of us can look at other and not judge how they should or shouldn't look with more/less makeup.


Amazing.


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2006
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 5:56pm

But wait, you actually said:

"Some of us think wearing makeup every day amounts to an unhealthy obsession."

My statement replied to the idea that its unhealthy to wear makeup every day. I dont think thats true. I honestly spend under 5 minutes putting on makeup. Im dont see how that in and of itself can amount to an "unhealthy obsession".

I never claimed that there weren't women who are unnaturally obsessed with their appearances. Of course there are and it's ridiculous and sad at the same time.

But, I dont think learning at a young age the proper way to apply makeup, and allowing clear gloss at 12 causes that type of behavior. I dont think makeup or fashion or hairstyles should be pushed on young girls. But, once a girl in puberty begins to be curious about things like that, I dont think they should just be shut out with "you're too young".

IME that leads to pancake makeup and black eyeliner being put on in the bathroom before homeroom.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 5:58pm
Mores and values, not class per se. I simply explained that the two are connected to some degree.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 5:58pm

Then why do you feel that her posts are insulting?

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 6:00pm

I try for the non-scented kind myself....I hate smelling like some of those scents.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2006
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 6:01pm

Oh really? Ive never done the deparment store thing, so I dont know about it for sure.

I brought my 14 year old neighbor to Sephora to have her makeup done (it was free) for a dance, and the girl who did it explained what she was doing, why she was using what she was, etc.

I thought it was a great experience for her. I guess it depends on the employee.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2006
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 6:03pm
Yeah it was that, and people freaking out about lip gloss. I already posted to you somewhere that I dont think 7 year olds should be sporting makeup, but I also think its silly to go nuts over a 12 year old wearing lip gloss.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2006
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 6:03pm
Never stops me! LOL I learned from my dh a long time ago... confidence is everything!

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