Advice: The big "talk"

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2005
Advice: The big "talk"
1221
Sun, 02-18-2007 - 7:28am

Okay, I need advice on when people started or will start to have the big "talk" with their kids.

My oldest is going to be 9 next week. I have some friends telling me they already had this talk with their children at this age. She just seems so young to me. She still plays house, school and dolls with her little sister. IMO, telling her about sex is going to take some innocence away from her. But, am I sheltering her too much?

She knows about periods and body hair development. She already has little breats "bumps" (as she likes to call "em).

Agghhh..I really thought I had until she was 12 to have this talk like my mother did.

What is everyone's opinion?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 6:21pm
Yes, they seem fond of blush. I hate how that looks. I sometimes watched them because I do not know about makeup and thought they might be helpful, but the results made me change my mind.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2006
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 6:28pm

Well Im only operating on a single experience here. The woman didnt do that awful bright reddish orange stripe thing across her cheeks that some people wear. My neighbor has very fair skin with really dark hair and it would have looked even more garish on her than on the average person!

The woman doing the makeup did a pale pink blush right on the apples of her cheeks. It looked pretty natural and understated to me.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 7:13pm
I find it insulting to imply that it is something to worry about if your child is friends with someone of a lower class.


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 7:14pm
Obviously, class must play a very large role in your worldview.


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 7:51pm

if there's one connection i feel with my girls now and hopefully ongoing,it's empathy......the first time i did that was when we were going through dd1's condition in another state. it used to break my heart,terribly that she froze in public places,not saying a word. what helped break the ice was when i used to say ellie,when i was your age,i used to be scared to talk (i was a very shy kid,too) and it's ok. her little 5 year old eyes used to get so big when i said that..........and now,it's amazing how that continues. when she or her sister come home from school and say something about friends,about school work,etc,it's delightful to approach it in a "when i was your age...." sort of way.

there's so much i learn from them,too. just the other day,my dd1 picked out a pair of skinny khakis she wanted to wear to school. she hadn't worn them before so when she pulled them on,she told me they reminded her of joupers (sp..the horse riding pant). my reaction was a wow. what are those? tell me more. lol.




Edited 2/28/2007 8:37 pm ET by egd3blessed

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 7:57pm
Vanity, I guess, and the fact that ageism is alive and well in corporate America.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 7:59pm
You're right.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 8:01pm
But it's the stress and anxiety (in the workplace anyway) that enable me to afford those antiwrinkle creams.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 8:04pm
You don't mind if your children are friends with people one or two class rungs lower than you are?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-28-2007 - 8:06pm

I think maybe some men should, lol!

Actually I like that metrosexual look. A little black eyeliner, some nail polish on an otherwise manly-man. HOT. Of course I'm also secretly in love with David Beckham so go figure!

Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

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