Is this an age related thing?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Is this an age related thing?
1277
Thu, 04-12-2007 - 9:45am

(Totally OT, not SAH/WOH related, so feel free to not respond)


I went out with 5 other women to dinner last night.

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Avatar for cmerin
Administrator
Registered: 01-20-2004
Thu, 04-26-2007 - 11:23pm

Erin
Community Technical Assistant | Community Moderator
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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2004
Thu, 04-26-2007 - 11:26pm
It is very common for a server to ask where I am.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-14-2006
Thu, 04-26-2007 - 11:32pm

I can understand why a large party can be stressful, that is a lot of appies and dinners etc to prepare at *once*. I do watch Gordon Ramsay's TV Shows a lot ;) And I also understand the difference between a reasonable and unreasonable request.

Some restaurant customers can be very demanding, rude and expect a lot. I don't expect to be slaved upon, but i do expect a separate check to be a possible service i can get. If the waitress says 'sorry, we cannot do that right now because...' then ok. I can deal with that. If I get some sort of answer like it's too stressful or the wait staff doesn't want to... then I might rethink my tip and/or coming back to that place. My nights out are limited and I will not waste it on a place that was so/so. I can even forgive a waitress if shes stressed out because another table is being unreasonable. She might be having a bad night.

I always tip fair and will tip well for exceptional service. I can only think of a small amount of times I tipped badly if at all. And there were big problems involved, from food to wait staff, and those restaurants are no longer in business.

Anyway, I guess my point is, separate checks is not unreasonable, and if I ever heard some restaurant staff or manager say that (either to me or to someone else within earshot) then I would not go back. There are more tactful ways of handling it then calling someone unreasonable for a simple question.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2003
Fri, 04-27-2007 - 10:51am

>>Do you know of any restaurants that refuse to accept debit and/or credit cards for groups of over a certain number?<<

i know of resteraunts that refuse to accept credit cards of any kind, i know of resteraunts that refuse to accept certain credit cards (usually amex or discover), i know of resteraunts taht refuse to accept debit cards, i know of resteraunts that refuse to accept multiple credit cards for parties over 6-8 people. i know of (the vast majority) resteraunts taht refuse to split checks at all for parties over 6-8 people.

>>So you believe it is unreasonable for a large group to ever pay in anything but one lump payment?<<

i believe it is unreasonable for large parties to have split checks, yes. as do the majority of resteraunts here. hence the overwhelming policy against it.

>>So really, it isn't about separate checks at all as you claimed, but rather the overall attitude of the customer? <<

WRT snobbery and refusal of service overall - yes. WRT five star resteraunts splitting the check is a deal breaker. (generally speaking - and around here).

>>I generally tip very generously when I have made any additional requests, whether asking for a substitution, sauce on the side, separate checks, or anytime I am out with a large group.<<

as an aside, and IMPO, a big tip does not always equal a great customer, or one i would serve again. granted, i prefer big tips, but if a customer or party was a total PITA, but left a big tip i still wouldn't be likely to wait on them if they came in again. the money isn't *that* important - it isn't worth the migraine.

>>But this is an extremely small percentage of restaurants nationwide that cater to this clientele. I understand that wealthy people generally discuss money as little as possible.<<

i can't speak as to how large or small taht percentage is nationwide. i can say we have several, if not more of these types of resteraunts here.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2003
Fri, 04-27-2007 - 10:59am

>>I don't think anyone said it was the only measure. But if I were at a restaurant and they didn't want to split a check just because it's too time consuming, I'd feel the same as if they felt it was too time consuming to get me a napkin if I asked for one.<<

the difference in your examples however, are that you can't get up and get your own napkin in a resteraunt (well, i suppose you *could* if you felt like fishing around the wait station), but when a check comes the orders are all itemized and as a perfectly intellegent adult i'm guessing one could very easily split the check in one's head - or simply look at it and know how much to pay.

then again, i also find the entire notion of requireing a check to be split to be odd - as a customer. i've never felt teh need or desire to split a check up for each individual or couple dining out. what purpose does it serve? why do we need to be so clinical and compartmentalized with our orders and money? is paying for *exactly* what you ordered down to the penny really that important in a big group? do people who do this routinely nickel and dime themselves and others when payment is concerned for other outings and events?

>>ETA: If it were restaurant policy, I wouldn't "take it out" on the server, but I would feel it reflects badly on the management.<<

why? nobody has been able to really answer that one just yet. why does it reflect badly on anyone in the resteraunt? does it reflect badly on a resteruant if the hostess doesn't pull out your seat and put your napkin in your lap for you? to some, thats a part of good service. to me, and most people, its a nicety that isn't needed nor thought about if not offered or done as policy.

>>And... I can't imagine why someone would "enjoy" eating somewhere where all the employees were judging and being rude to people they deem "not good enough", but to each their own I guess.<<

i guess what you don't know won't spoil your appetite ;) judgment of customers is fairly common, regardless of where you're eating - fast food, casual dining, fine dining - it happens.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2003
Fri, 04-27-2007 - 11:01am

oh, i've never ben to sonic, but checkers was THE BEST EVER! those stupidly good cajun fries and banana milkshakes.

mmmmmm.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2003
Fri, 04-27-2007 - 11:02am

you just stated in another post that "if they don't ask, they seperate anyway"

so obviously, they don't ask *all* the time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2003
Fri, 04-27-2007 - 11:09am
The problem here is that you are trying to apply your experience at a limited number of restaurants in a small geographical area universally. As many have pointed out, both restaurant diners and waitresses, asking for separate checks is not an unreasonable request at most restaurants.


Avatar for cmerin
Administrator
Registered: 01-20-2004
Fri, 04-27-2007 - 11:43am

Erin
Community Technical Assistant | Community Moderator
iVillage.com

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2000
Fri, 04-27-2007 - 11:56am
I keep hearing about Sonic but we don't have them here! Is it fast food? If so, too bad as I'm not normally a fan of fast food with the exception of Chik Fil A. However, I'd try it b/c I've heard so much about it.

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