Entitlement

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2005
Entitlement
19
Wed, 08-18-2010 - 8:06am

I was recently involved in a discussion in which someone mentioned the sense of entitlement in this country. The point was that people who have lost jobs or are unable to pay their bills have shown a sense of entitlement in having their problems taken care of for them.

It made me start to think. I feel entitled. I feel entitled to food, water, and shelter. I feel entitled to a decent house. I feel entitled to my retirement savings, my annual vacation, and the clothes I buy. I feel my children are entitled to their college funds, the education our public school provides and that we pay ridiculous taxes for, and to medical care paid for by the insurance I buy.

Why would my sense of entitlement be any better? I pay for these things, but I do so because I can. I am healthy, smart enough (not calling myself smart, just smart enough to earn at the level I do), and educated enough. Some of the people at the heart of the discussion were people who felt entitled to significantly less than I feel entitled to. They only felt entitled to have shelter, food and clothing for their children, medical care. I have heard the argument that feeling entitled to things you can pay for yourself is different than feeling entitled to something but expecting others to pay for it, but I do not necessarily agree.

My question for anyone who cares to debate or discuss: which is worse, feeling entitled to things you need but are unable to provide for yourself or family or feeling entitled to things you do not need or to more of the world's resources than you need?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
In reply to: ka032006
Wed, 08-18-2010 - 2:13pm

i believe we ALL deserve basic, human rights, what i/we are capable of providing on our own the government subsidizes for those who can not.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
In reply to: ka032006
Wed, 08-18-2010 - 1:35pm
also wanted to add, while my kids do deserve public education, they must work for their grades and success..i'm not a parent who places blame on the system for their education.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
In reply to: ka032006
Wed, 08-18-2010 - 1:28pm
true, my kids, all children, deserve the right to public educaiton..decent is subjective, whta i think that is you do not.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2008
In reply to: ka032006
Wed, 08-18-2010 - 1:16pm
I also think you have to factor in who is providing the things one feels entitled to. The first woman is more deserving of that food and shelter FROM HER HUSBAND. The second is arguably more deserving of that food and sheslter FROM PUBLIC SOURCES. Neither are deserving of that food and shelter from an UNRELATED THIRD PARTY.



I agree. And when someone feels entitled to support from someone who doesn't have to give it and more importantly, ISN'T giving it, be that a husband, public sources, or some third party, that creates an personal struggle that is really hard to resolve. If someone gets, and appreciates, but does not feel entitled to support from others, then whatever you get, you can be okay with, and the entitlement-driven struggle isn't there.

"Life is the art of drawing without an eraser."

John W. Gardner



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"The key to good decision making is not knowledge. It is understanding."
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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2008
In reply to: ka032006
Wed, 08-18-2010 - 1:07pm

Yep. But I would definitely distinguish between "an entitlement program" and "I feel entitled to the entitlement program." I was discussing feeling entitled. I feel entitled to send my children to public school because I have that right, the school is there, my children do qualify by living near the school, I think the education they provide there is good, so why not. I do not feel society "owes" me any entitlement programs. If I did, I would be dependent on society to provide me with those things I felt it owed me, and I'd likely be disillusioned when what I got feel way short of what I felt I deserved, frustrated with my inability to get what I needed handed to me, and disempowered.

I don't want my kids feeling entitled to what they have, I want them to recognize when they are getting something they did NOT earn and that is NOT guaranteed for all. I want them to appreciate those things. Not feel entitled to those things.

"Life is the art of drawing without an eraser."

John W. Gardner



Photobucket



Ten Rules for Being Human


Photobucket



"The key to good decision making is not knowledge. It is understanding."
Malcolm Gladwell Blink

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-10-2009
In reply to: ka032006
Wed, 08-18-2010 - 1:07pm

I like the thought process here.


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-10-2009
In reply to: ka032006
Wed, 08-18-2010 - 1:03pm

I have a related dynamic in my family.


My parents have given my siblings substantially more financial assistance than they have given me. Substantially.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
In reply to: ka032006
Wed, 08-18-2010 - 12:57pm

Only in a country that allows it. Or in a country where the people were successful in changing their government.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
In reply to: ka032006
Wed, 08-18-2010 - 12:55pm

Yeah, which is why I qualified my country. Or at least that's what I meant.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
In reply to: ka032006
Wed, 08-18-2010 - 12:34pm
Isn't that how most governmental entitlements work? Society decides to pay for them?

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