Funny things your kids have said.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Funny things your kids have said.
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 4:16pm
I know everyone's got these things, but I'm laughing so hard I've got tears in my eyes.

My 3yo wanted me to hold him, and I told him that I wouldn't be able to hold him in my lap for very much longer, because soon I won't have a lap anymore.(Being pregnant)

He looks at me thoughtfully, and in his little 3yo lisp, says "Your legs are gonna fall off?"

What's the funniest thing your kid(s) have said?


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 4:34pm
Ok, for my dd's I have a couple each. Some you may find funny, some you may not...

For my oldest:

#1 One day I was fiddling around with the DVD player and Annikki asked me if I was going to play some music. I said no and asked why and she said she wanted to hear her favorite song. I asked what and she said "YOU know mom..." and I didn't so I asked again and she breaks out in, "Baby, everything is alright, uptight, outta sight..." (Uptight by Stevie Wonder)

#2 This was funny to me because of her innocence but I had a stern talk with her father about this one and could only laugh about it in private. I am dating this guy named Jerrod. We are not in a committed relationship but dating still and he was over as well as my best friend and her two kids. Well my goddaughter (best friends daughter) asked me for the gazillionth time if Jerrod was my boyfriend and for the gazillionth time we said no. Annikki then broke out with a passionate "No! My daddy is my mommy's boyfriend and her husband!" I asked her where she got that notion and she said from her father so I had a talk with him and found out that he'd told her that originally we were to get married. I told him to be careful how he frames these things with our 4 year-old because sometimes she just doesn't get it.

For the baby there isn't much although she talks extremely well for 1.5 year old. She talks in very complex sentences and her favorite thing to do is to tell on the cat. So one day the cat is in the kitchen we're in the living room (you can see the kitchen from the living room) and Zariyah bursts out "Mommy, mommy that dumb cat in the sink mommy. Bad Pepper! (cat's name) Bad Bad Pepper!"

One day when my godson came over (he's 5) he fell and skinned his knee. I patched him up and had him on my lap and he had his face buried in my bosom (his favorite place in the whole world) and Zariyah got jealous, tried to pry his head away and screamed "No Naters (his name is Nathan), my boobies!"

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2000
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 6:02pm
I wish I could think of one of Joel's. He's just so funny all the time that they kinda run together. ;-)

But I do have one from someone who isn't my kid but wishes she were.LOL This had me laughing so hard I was sure I'd PMP.

My SO's 5-year-old dd was playing Barbies this past weekend, and was using her sister's skateboard as Barbies' "car". Riding in the car she had the bride Barbie and the ice skating BArbie, dressed in their finery, and Ken, who was naked.

So she showed me and I said something like, "Oh my, Ken needs to put some clothes on before he catches cold."

She looked at me with this huge wide-eyed, totally amazed expression and said, "Hey, how did you know his name is Ken? Did Daddy tell you?"


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2000
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 6:05pm
I'm LOL at Zariyah telling on the cat! That is so cute!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 6:31pm
OMG!!! i could write a book, and im going to one day. my ds2 was the funniest kid in the world!!! here are a few quotes:

while in nj visiting my parents when ds2 was 3yo, each day he said something else funny to my dad. one was,

Pop-pop, can i take a shower with you? i promise i wont laugh.

pop-pop, do you take your clothes off when you take a shower? (he never saw my dad even in his underwear)

pop-pop, do you have any kids? (he wanted someone to play with, i guess)

right after his fourth birthday, he was out in the street on one of the "big bikes". i went out and said, get out of the street with that bike. you're too little to be riding the bike in the street. he hollared back, while riding by, im not little, im four years old now. i said, "what did you have, a growth spirt on your birthday?", he said, without missing a beat, "no, i had vanilla!", and kept on going.

once my parents were down visiting around my moms birthday. the kids and i went out and bought a couple of things for her, so we would have some gifts to give her when we had cake and ice cream. i had gotten a couple vanilla votive candles for my mom from the kids. that evening when we sang happy birthday, she started opening her presents. when she got to the one from the kids, my dd said in her little crackly voice, "its not candles....". it was so cute and funny. she was a little tiny blonde peanut, smart as a whip, and thought she was fooling my mom.

that is just a few. what memories.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2003
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 7:58pm
Hi, I'm new here, and thought I would add to this discussion.

When my daughter first started potty training, she had just finished up in the bathroom and came out to talk to me. She said "mom, my poop talks." I laughed and said "what did it say?" She said "ploop". It was hilarious! Hope everyone gets a kick outta that.


Avatar for taylormomma
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2003
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 9:07pm
Well, this one isn't the funniest thing dd ever said, but it says the most about her character, I think.

She was about four, and dh was unloading groceries from the car when it started to rain. So she ran out on the porch, pointed her finger at the sky and yelled, "God, you're making it rain on my Daddy! I am not at ALL happy about this!"

DS is 20 months, and just starting make sentences, and picking up new words all the time. So we're in that constantly pointing out "this is X" phase right now. So, we were at the grocery store, and dh picked up a potato, showed it to ds, and said, "This is a potato. Can you say potato?" Ds smiled at him brightly and replied "Yes!"

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2000
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 9:11pm
Hahahahahaha!!! The boy already has an excellent sense of humor!

I just love reading these things. :-)

Avatar for mygriffin
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 9:57pm
Griffin is 2.5. In Costco. Older man with a patch over one approaching.

"Look Mommy! A pirate."

Looking in the mirror last week. "Wanna see my brussel sprouts?" He was flaring his nostrils....and was talking about them.

After a shower one night. "Mommy, I have two balls in my pee pee."

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-1999
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 10:52pm
"Look Mommy! A pirate." >>

I laughed extra hard at this one b/c my mom is recovering from minor eye surgery and has a patch over her eye, so I've been telling DS she's Captain Feathersword from The Wiggles, as in, "Look sweetie, Grandma's Captain Feathersword!" I also called her "One-Eyed Willy." She has frequent eye surgeries and is used to my sick sense of humor.

DS doesn't talk much yet. But I have a cute THING that happened. Today at the park another little boy about his age was playing w/DS's favorite park thing. DS went and put his arms around the little kid and being afraid he was going to knock him over or bite or something, I said, "Sweetie, I don't think he wants a hug from you!" Well...apparently he did, b/c this little guy turned around and wrapped his arms around DS and gave him a huge hug. Showed me! was really cute.


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 11:50pm
>>DS is 20 months, and just starting make sentences, and picking up new words all the time.<<

I wish I could say this! My middle son is 22 months now, and ALL he will say is Mama! (And he says this CONSTANTLY!!!) When is this kid gonna talk?!?! He babbles a LOT, but, I, as his mother, who is with him nearly 24/7, cannot make out a WORD of it! I wish the boy would get ON with it already!!! lol --->Dawn