Helicopter Parenting

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Registered: 10-23-2001
Helicopter Parenting
519
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 6:56am

In an effort to move on from the other thread, Lol......  What is helicopter parenting IYO?  Do you see it only at school or in other settings as well?  What does it look like?  Provide examples if you can, Thank you. 

 


 


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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2013
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 2:21pm

chestnuthooligan wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">pumpkinangel</em> wrote:</div>&lt;p&gt;Anyone else the irony between the last thread and over supervising at parties (underage drinking) and now not following a child closely?&lt;/p&gt;</blockquote></p><p>Apparently between that thread and this thread one poster aged eight years from Hazeleyes 2005 to 2013. With age comes wisdom?</p>

<snort> From your keyboard to God's ears, Chestnut.

On Wednesdays we wear pink.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2013
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 2:26pm
Regina...same here. No need to have a phone before middle school.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 3:16pm

bordwithyou wrote:
And yet it's considered irresponsible to allow high school kids to br the next room at a graduation party without an adult monitoring then every minute. Strange.

I guess you see the irony as well, lol.  The majority of the time, I don't attend parties with my high school kids, either one of them unless I am specifically asked to chaperone.  To me attending all parties with a high schooler to monitor every minute as a poster suggested in a previous thread would be helicopter parenting.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 3:23pm

chestnuthooligan wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">pumpkinangel</em> wrote:</div>&lt;p&gt;Anyone else the irony between the last thread and over supervising at parties (underage drinking) and now not following a child closely?&lt;/p&gt;</blockquote></p><p>Apparently between that thread and this thread one poster aged eight years from Hazeleyes 2005 to 2013. With age comes wisdom?</p>

I guess but I do admit I'm chuckling a bit over this thread...

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 3:26pm

reginageorge2005 wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">jamblessedthree</em> wrote:</div>&lt;p&gt;Ha, Does your DS text?  I don't think my 10 YO knows how yet but he has started asking when he's allowed his own phone, My old fashioned self would put it off indefinately if I could but I've used m/s as that time for his sisters and that's when he'll be allowed one too.&lt;/p&gt;</blockquote></p><p>He uses the text feature on his iPod. He doesn't have a phone yet, he'll get one over the summer before middle school. But he's been texting and Facetiming since he got the iPod. It is a great way for him to stay in touch w/his cousins who live 7 hours away. I'm not a technophobe. I don't think keeping electronics out of my kids' hands is doing them any favors in a society increasingly dependent on developing technology.</p>

Mine both received cell phones before middle school as well, which for them was between 6th and 7th grade. We also have ipods/touch (rarely used anymore), laptops, a few kindles and an ipad.  I think it's a good thing to not forbid kids from using electronics or look at them as if they are horrible devices....but use them in moderation, they are good for a lot of things.  They aren't going to go away anytime soon and just like I taught my children years ago to start caring for themselves so I wouldn't be a helicopter parent, I'm teaching them to use these devices as well.  So fast forward in a few years and there will be a thread on this and I will chuckle over the irony again!

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2013
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 3:34pm
I don't think there is anything wrong with cellphones for kids but IME there is no reason for my elementary school child to have one. They either get dropped off at school or take the bus. They are there all day unless we get called for sickness. Then they go either to after-care, after school activity or on the bus home.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2013
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 3:45pm

hazeleyes2013 wrote:
I don't think there is anything wrong with cellphones for kids but IME there is no reason for my elementary school child to have one. They either get dropped off at school or take the bus. They are there all day unless we get called for sickness. Then they go either to after-care, after school activity or on the bus home.

For that matter--what is the reason for kids to have iPod touches, or iPads or Kindles/Nooks, laptops, etc? DS got a laptop for his bday a few years back. He needed it for school. The reason he got an iPod? He wanted it. It isn't a need, anymore than I "need" an unlimited data plan for my phone. It is a want. 

Having said that, with middle school comes a bit more autonomy and freedhom than in elementary school. Does he "need" a cell phone in a few months? No. And he certainly doesn't need the iPhone he'll likely get. But it is a convenience we'll indulge because we can. 

On Wednesdays we wear pink.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2013
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 3:49pm
I would say that an ipod touch, laptop, ipad, computer is a want and extra luxury. Cellphone is for emergencies (foremost). In elementary school my kids either have or do go to after-care or on the bus. No need to call us for anything as if they need something, they can use the school phones. In middle school they walk to school and to me the cellphone is for emergency calls and then is is useful when they do things with their friends, go on field trips, etc. In high school it is used for everything as while they take a bus to and from school there are many times they need to be picked for one thing or another. More going out with friends, dropping off, picking up, etc.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2013
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 3:55pm

Talking about thank you notes. I just received one from the family of one of the three wakes I went to last
week :(

Another place where you say your thank you's but always receive a thank you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2013
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 3:59pm

Laptop was needed for school--typing reports and doing powerpoint presentations. That started in third grade--pretty sure that's when he got the laptop, ninth bday in 3rd grade. I'd say 90%-95% of his peers have their own laptops. It may not be a need where you are, but it is here. Particularly since my computer is used for school and DH's is used for work. So DS got his own for HIS schoolwork. I'm guessing he'll have tablet by the time he's in high school...although I'll likely just upgrade my own iPad and give him my current one. Again--not necessary, but totally awesome to take notes and infinitely more portable than a laptop.

He doesn't need a cell phone next year. He wants one. As I recall, I survived until the ripe old age of 22 or 23 w/o one, so it's not like he couldn't survive without one. But it will make his life easier and make my life easier, so he'll get one. But I don't pretend he needs it. He doesn't. It isn't any more of a necessity than his X Box.

On Wednesdays we wear pink.

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