Helicopter Parenting

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Helicopter Parenting
520
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 6:56am

In an effort to move on from the other thread, Lol......  What is helicopter parenting IYO?  Do you see it only at school or in other settings as well?  What does it look like?  Provide examples if you can, Thank you. 

 


 


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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Mon, 02-25-2013 - 12:23pm

thardy2001 wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">hazeleyes2013</em> wrote:</div>So you don't think the kids can play with their friends and do things while the parents socialize?</blockquote></p><p>I hear that.  When DH and/or just I are also included in these parties, I rarely even see my child(ren)!  I often volunteer to get other children nearby a(nother) cupcake or whatever's on the table, a glass of water, etc.  (And then I offer to help the hostess with clean-up if necessary because I know I always appreciate that at my home.)</p><p>Is your area conducive to block parties?  We have them here and, again, some of the same moms and dads whose children go to school with mine.  I love the "horses" ~ the kids are enclosed, safe and the adults sidle up to the keg, wine buckets!  So classy.  (And everyone gets to walk home.)</p>

Rarely ever see the children...interesting.  So how is it that one is spending quality time with the kids and adults ?

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2013
Mon, 02-25-2013 - 12:22pm

thardy2001 wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">jamblessedthree</em> wrote:</div>  It's an individual thing not regional thing.</blockquote></p><p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">pumkinangel</em> wrote:</div>  I disagree, clearly things are done differently in different regions of the country.</blockquote></p><p>So Pumpkinangel, including me, that's 3 who disagree with you that it's a regional thing.  My experience has been the same as Hazeleyes and Jam.   3 from different regions, same experience.</p>

The cool thing about America - well, Earth, since there are other countries represented here - is that there's more than just one region. I'm sure things are done in certain parts of my state that aren't done in my area, but are also done in yours. It doesn't make you any more right than anyone else. The nitpicking over one tiny phrase can drive a person nuts. (not directing that to you, Thardy)

Shaking my head at the things grown women get their panties in a wad about.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Mon, 02-25-2013 - 12:20pm

thardy2001 wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">pumpkinangel</em> wrote:</div>Yes and no.  I agree that more quality time with other kid's parents is good and we become better friends, I just don't think a kids birthday party is the place to spend quality time with other parents.  I think a birthday party for a child is about the child, not an opportunity for me to have social time with other parents.  </blockquote></p><p>That's the problem with dumping and running.  It's impossible to know.  The child will always be, as you intimate, "celebrated," while children and adults alike spend quality time together.</p>

Who is dumping and running? Is that a personal experience you wish to share for debate?  But you are right, I can't speak for this personal experience of yours, the dumping and running, sorry!  

Really it's okay, parents don't attend childrens birthday parties much past early elementary school here and we all still mangage to have quality time together.  Shocking, I know not to use a childs birthday party for adults.  

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Mon, 02-25-2013 - 12:17pm

thardy2001 wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">jamblessedthree</em> wrote:</div>  It's an individual thing not regional thing.</blockquote></p><p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">pumkinangel</em> wrote:</div>  I disagree, clearly things are done differently in different regions of the country.</blockquote></p><p>So Pumpkinangel, including me, that's 3 who disagree with you that it's a regional thing.  My experience has been the same as Hazeleyes and Jam.   3 from different regions, same experience.</p>

Well no, that isn't accurate as I believe that Hazel and Jam are in the same region and there are three from my region who agree with me that it's a regional thing.  I don't know what region of the country you are in but I know that neither Jam or Haz are in my region...  Further, Haz is now claiming that she doesn't attend parties much in elementary school and not at all in high school unless there are special circumstances so she has flip flopped to what we have been saying all along....parents only attend in very early elementary school.

No worries though, I can't keep up with the contradictions either!

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2013
Mon, 02-25-2013 - 12:16pm

I live 20 miles from PKA and 90 miles from Bord. What they describe is the way things are done around here. Which would be in our region. Which would mean that differences are, indeed, regional.

On Wednesdays we wear pink.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Mon, 02-25-2013 - 12:14pm

hazeleyes2013 wrote:
Said what? There is zero context to know what you are asking, there is a little green quote button on the right hand side, it is a very nice button. -----where I said I attend the parties of my high schooler.

In this thread or the thread about underage drinking?

Here in this thread, I have already provided it for you once but here it is yet again.

Quote:  It depends on the location of the party and many times the relationship to the parents. The youngest child mostly though more than the teenager unless it is a different circumstance.

So since you are "now" claiming that you don't attend hs parties, how are you going to prevent underage drinking at these events?

PumpkinAngel

Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Mon, 02-25-2013 - 12:10pm

Bord, you are not crushed that you were doing bday parties RONG!? It is lovely though that the triummulierate can bond over this.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Mon, 02-25-2013 - 12:09pm

hazeleyes2013 wrote:
Since they aren't posting here and I don't know what they have really said...that is not supportive of your point in this debate. If you would like to post actual comments or actual data instead of "friends" then let me know, otherwise I'm going to have to go with what has been posted and regional it is.

-----I guess than your debate is not supportive either as I have not heard from all the other parents at the parties your children have attended to say if they stay or not and if it is an individual thing or regional.

But you have heard from at least two other posters in my region who have said the same thing that I have said, which is something that i have mentioned at least 2-3 times now.  I find it interesting that you contradict 3 actual active posters with actual experiences by a poster from a region you don't know, "friends" from other regions and televison. And now, there is the contradiction that you don't attend many elementary school parties (despite the fact that you stated you attend them all at one point) and you don't attend high school parties despite the claims in a previous debate on underage drinking.

Yes, lets just ignore the facts in order to disagree.  Oh boy, so funny.

PumpkinAngel

Avatar for savcal2011
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2010
Mon, 02-25-2013 - 12:04pm

hazeleyes2013 wrote:
exactly and I wouldn't consider myself a social butterfly but I do enjoy doing things with my friends, having them over and entertaining. It is all about balancing. You can't have all of one thing or another. That is why some friends are only seen a few times a year and others on a regular basis.

Oh, but if I try to achieve balance by not fully, deeply befriending every parent I meet a school function you grill me.  But YOU are superior for being able to achieve balance? What. Evah.

"I don’t mind a banshee, that’s fine. 2 banshees? I HATE you. I actually wish bad things upon you." -- Day[9] Daily #459 P1

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Mon, 02-25-2013 - 12:03pm

hazeleyes2013 wrote:
So you don't think the kids can play with their friends and do things while the parents socialize?

I hear that.  When DH and/or just I are also included in these parties, I rarely even see my child(ren)!  I often volunteer to get other children nearby a(nother) cupcake or whatever's on the table, a glass of water, etc.  (And then I offer to help the hostess with clean-up if necessary because I know I always appreciate that at my home.)

Is your area conducive to block parties?  We have them here and, again, some of the same moms and dads whose children go to school with mine.  I love the "horses" ~ the kids are enclosed, safe and the adults sidle up to the keg, wine buckets!  So classy.  (And everyone gets to walk home.)

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