Helicopter Parenting

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Helicopter Parenting
520
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 6:56am

In an effort to move on from the other thread, Lol......  What is helicopter parenting IYO?  Do you see it only at school or in other settings as well?  What does it look like?  Provide examples if you can, Thank you. 

 


 


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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2013
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 7:03pm

I've been to Catholic funerals and visitations, but IDK what a mass card is. Like Bord, I either send flowers or make a memorial donation to the family's suggested charity. I'm not going to say they don't have them, but as someone who isn't Catholic, I wouldn't even know to look for one.

On Wednesdays we wear pink.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 6:49pm
To tell the truth, I do not know what the custom is with Mass cards and wakes ( it is called "visitation" here) is. We have Catholic friends, of course, but I guess we have been lucky enough not to have them or any of their close relatives die whole we've lived here. I've only ever sent Mass cards twice in my life, once for the mother of a childhood friend, and once for the son of a co-worker. In most cases when a Catholic acquaintance dies we send a memorial gift or flowers instead.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2013
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 6:28pm
My oldest got a laptop at the age of 13. It was a Christmas gift from a relative and it was wonderful as 4 people trying to use one computer was just not working out. I got an ipad last year but it seems everyone just "needs" to use it too. lol.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2013
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 6:26pm
I would think it is a regional thing then. Do you have mass cards at wakes also?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 6:15pm

bordwithyou wrote:
I admit I am old-fashioned about some of these things. My answer to "When will your kids get their own "X?" is often ''When they can afford to buy themselves one." We bought DS#1 his first laptop as a high school graduation gift. The younger one bought a used one himself when he was about fifteen with $$ he'd earned. I still own neither a laptop nor a tablet.

  That was when our DDs got lap tops as high school graduation presents for college.  I was the last in the household to get one.  I do also have a tablet, got it about a year ago.  We got each of  them Kindle Fires for their birthdays last year so they were 29,27 and 23. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 6:11pm
If personal cards/letters become a thing of the past, I will miss them, too. I had a great-aunt who never had children of her own. She was my grandmother's twin sister and like a second Mom to my Dad and a third grandma to me. From the time i was about eight and for as long as she was able (she had Alzheimer's the last decade or so of her life), we wrote to each other every week. I still have her letters to me, and when she died, I found she had all the letters I had written to her for close to forty years. I cherish those. E-mails and texts are not the same thing.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 6:05pm
Maybe it's a west coast/Midwestern thing. I have seen those pre-printed cards. We may gave even gotten some of them in the Swag Bag from the funeral directors that did my Mom's or my Great Aunt's funeral (which I arranged). But we didn't use them. I've never received one, either.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2013
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 5:57pm

bordwithyou wrote:
I have seen those pre-printed ones, but I think they are tacky. We sent handwritten personalized notes to everyone who had done something nice for us when my Mom was hospitalized/died. By that I mean things like watching my niece so my sister could be at the hospital, helping with transportation, making phone calls, sending flowers, srnding cards, making donations in my mother's name, etc. We had a thank-you luncheon after the funeral and we also gave away my mother 's bell collection and dozens of framed photographs at the luncheon. Mom had over a thousand bells, most of them gifts from people at the funeral. We made veneer pieces with the bells and pictures of Mom through the years with friends and business associates and asked people to take those home as our "thank you" for supporting us through the process. But I certainly did not feel obligated to send a ersonal thank you note to everyone who had just shown up at the service and luncheon.

IMHO, a thank you is always a handwritten, personal note. Signing your name to a preprinted note is not a proper thank you. But Bord, as your mother lived on one of the coasts, that isn't exactly regional...

On Wednesdays we wear pink.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 5:50pm
I admit I am old-fashioned about some of these things. My answer to "When will your kids get their own "X?" is often ''When they can afford to buy themselves one." We bought DS#1 his first laptop as a high school graduation gift. The younger one bought a used one himself when he was about fifteen with $$ he'd earned. I still own neither a laptop nor a tablet.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2013
Sat, 02-23-2013 - 5:30pm
Sorry you feel that way Bord as it must be a regional thing and never found them tacky. We sent them out for my dad's and I have always gotten one.

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