I could use some experienced moms help!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2004
I could use some experienced moms help!
91
Sun, 08-22-2010 - 10:49pm

Okay I need help, bad.


Savannah is 2, she will be 3 in November.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2004
Tue, 08-24-2010 - 10:40pm
Honestly, there are times I really need a time out, lol
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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Wed, 08-25-2010 - 7:25am

i placed DS in time outs more than my older two combined, LOL, but i never really liked that form of punishment.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Wed, 08-25-2010 - 7:36am

Maybe I won't lock myself in the bathroom after all ;)


 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2003
Wed, 08-25-2010 - 7:59am

I had the same issues with my son. I sought the advice of a child psychologist. Some kids just don't respond to the "normal" time out scenario, charting, positive random comments, etc.


I ended up getting rid of timeouts with my son totally.


The fact is that nobody knows what is really going on with your child - including you right now. Why waste any more time - I would get professional help.


It took my son 2 weeks to change his behavior once I implemented the suggestions of the psycologist. I couldn't believe how easy it was.


Funny comment from the psycologist after a few meetings.


Mom, "So when do I bring my son in."


Psycologist, "I usually don't need to see the kids once I am done with the parent."


Funny but humbling parent moment number 450,938.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Wed, 08-25-2010 - 9:55am

Time outs aren't just for children. We do toy time outs as well. They fight over a toy or use a toy to hit, the toy gets put up for awhile. The dog misbehaves, she gets put outside. My sister's dogs are crate trained so that's where they go for their time outs. Time outs can be very versatile.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Wed, 08-25-2010 - 9:59am

I don't consider time outs to be punishments. It separates the child from the situation so she can regain control over her actions and emotions. Punishment/consequences of her behavior is separate from the time out. Most of the time, time out occurs before things escalates to the point of requiring punishment or consequences.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2007
Wed, 08-25-2010 - 10:16am
What is your preferred form of punishment or consequence?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Wed, 08-25-2010 - 11:59am
when i sent my kid to time out, h/she would go kicking and screaming.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Wed, 08-25-2010 - 12:06pm

if

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2000
Thu, 08-26-2010 - 12:27am

Like I said, the time out isn't punishment but a cooling off period so that there could be a discussion about the incident and why they behaved as they did. If a correction (punishment if you will) is needed that is discussed and agreed to (when they were older) or imposed (for younger children but still discussed as to why the correction was needed) and implemented. It could be as simple as an apology, a toy removed, restitution made, clean up the mess. It depended on the incident. Included in the discussion is suggestion as to how they should react in future incidents. And in some cases the time out is also for me so that I can calm down and get control of myself so I don't over react and fly off the handle. It gives me a chance to think through things before discussing it with the child.

Chris

The truth may be out there but lies are in your head. Terry Pratchett

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