I haven't run away...I promise

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
I haven't run away...I promise
Wed, 01-28-2004 - 8:09pm

I have just been incredibly busy trying to adjust to everything. I had a meeting with Social Security last Firday about benefits and the money was double the amount I thought I would get and they had it in checking account Tuesday. It was very nice to not worry about money for awhile.

It has been a rough week emotionally. I watched Analyze That the other day and Billy Crystal kept saying Grief is a process. That remark has become my motto. I have been very teary and very fragile lately. I don't even know what will set me off. Zak has been an utter terror and I have threatened to send him to miltary school. He has made several hurtful remarks and been very disobedient. He has managed, since Saturday, to ruin my cable box by watering the plant on top of it when I told him not to, set off an elevator alarm at my health club, hit his brother, make sarcastic remarks and just be awful. I feel like I am in a National Geographic special. I am the mother lioness and he is the cub pushing my boundaries. I spent Friday morning crying on his school counselors shoulder. We are just readjusting and muddling along.

I am going to try to post more when things settle down. I know there were some discussions about people you can't question on the board and I hope people don't feel that way about me. I have put it all out here and I certainly love a good debate. I have so much emotion inside me right now that I might need a good debate. I am reading a book about the epidemic of spoiled children in America which has been caused by...working mothers, co-sleeping and lack of physical punishment. Imagine that. I immediately thought of the board.

"I do not want to be a princess! I want to be myself"

Mallory (age 3)



iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
Wed, 01-28-2004 - 9:03pm

Hugs to you. You're in my thoughts alot. I'd love to write more right now ... I've missed you. I'd love to be a shoulder for you to cry on right now, but I feel like chit. Cough, muscle aches, slight fever .. all cropped up late afternoon .. ugh.

So, hold on ... I'll be here for you later on, k?

Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color.  Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-1999
Wed, 01-28-2004 - 10:17pm
Hey--I'm here if you need anything--even if you just need to vent about the kiddos. I had a friend call today who I hadn't heard from in over a year, she was having a bad mommy day and just needed to talk to someone who wouldn't judge! ;)

I pulled Chase's paci today--cold turkey except for bedtime and naps. He threw a 20 minute tantrum (yes, I timed it) after his nap. UGH.

Hang in there--I'm thinking about you.

And what's the name of the book, sounds amusing.

Hugs, C

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 01-28-2004 - 11:21pm
Aww sweetie I can't imagine what you are going through, it's so unfair. I'm glad you got good news from SS, not having to worry about money is a plus.

Zach will be angry at the world right now and you are the nearest target.

I can't offer any words of wisdom because I haven't been where you are. You are in my thoughts.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2003
Thu, 01-29-2004 - 8:12am

I think you had a rough week *because* of the good news from social security.

Congratulations! I'm so happy to hear it. I just heard the good news and popped back over, just in case you were still checking in.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 01-29-2004 - 8:40am
I have absolutely no advice for you..but I do have lot's of HUGS!!!!!!!


Avatar for laurenmom2boys
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 01-29-2004 - 11:53am
Kristi, as always my prayers are with you and your family. This is going to be very difficult for you all to get through, especially Zak. You're going to have very rough times. But you know we're all here for you if you need to vent. Or if you need to argue! LOL!

There are no magic words to make you feel better. Just know that we all care about you and your children and we're all praying for you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 01-29-2004 - 12:03pm
First, put down that stupid book! It's totally understandable that Zak is acting up right now. Deal with him as best you can, get him the help he needs, and put off re-evaluation of your parenting philosophy to another day.

>>I am reading a book about the epidemic of spoiled children in America which has been caused by...working mothers, co-sleeping and lack of physical punishment. Imagine that. I immediately thought of the board>>>

Second, find something to read that makes you feel good. I remember after the 9/11 attacks--they didn't affect me personally, but like everyone else I was distressed. I went to the library and picked up a Jane Austen novel. I wanted to read something that transported me to a completly different time and place.

Hang in there.


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-20-2001
Thu, 01-29-2004 - 1:14pm
ITA w/you ... Kristie should make a better choice for reading.


Linda - wife, mother, grandmum                     &nb

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 01-29-2004 - 1:21pm
When I'm missing my mom or having a problem, I read some of the notes mom left me and my brother in her dresser drawers for us to find when we went through her things after her death.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2003
Thu, 01-29-2004 - 1:29pm
Thanks for checking in! I've been thinking about you . . .

And honestly, I *would* question you. It's just that everything you've written I agree with!!! :)