Letting your adult child live at home
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|Sun, 03-28-2004 - 1:50pm|
Dh and I have discussed this, and we pretty much agree that our kids are welcome to live in our home as long as they need to. Now, that doesnt mean live at home and mooch off mom and dad while laying around in their bathrobe all day watching Mtv! But if at 18, my dd doesnt feel completely *ready* to leave the nest, we'd be fine with her living at home and going to school for a couple years before she opted to move out. I'd prefer to see her go out of state for school, but I also have seen kids who were a very *young* 18 who really were NOT ready for that level of autonomy, and ended up doing very poorly in college. I'd rather she live at home a bit longer than risk her dropping out! I probably wouldnt make her pay rent, but I'd ask that she help out with household chores and such, and maybe have her contribute towards groceries, etc. I wouldnt have a curfew but I would require that she call if she wasnt going to be home. Just common respect things.
Also, statistically, more and more young adults are living at home. Considering that the upcoming generation is likely to be the first to have a lower socioeconomic status/standard of living, than their parents, its become quite the *norm* for them to live at home until mid 20's. Housing prices and such are so astronomical now, many kids just cant AFFORD to live on their own.
One of my best friends has her 24yo son back at home. He went to college in anther town, got his degree and a pretty good job. But he is paying back hundreds of dollars a month in student loans right now, and between that and all the other *life* expenses, it would be a huge struggle for him to try to find some crappy apartment. Now, she is HAPPY to have him home-he cooks dinner a lot, carts the younger kids around, and she is one of those moms who TRULY enjoys the company of her children. She said she'd rather he live at home for another year and save for a house. And since they were not able to financially help as much as she would have liked as far as college, she feels that letting him live at home while he tries to knock down some of that student debt is her way of helping him out.
So how would YOU feel if your 18+ wanted to live at home? Would there be specific conditions? Would you want them to pay rent, etc?