Moms who know better than you

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Moms who know better than you
1270
Sun, 10-20-2013 - 8:02am

Kind of joking there.  But the other day I met a mom who was certain she knew which area schools were the best.  I told her my children are happily in public school, but upon entering middle school and/or upon entering 8th grade, if any of mine wants, then we'll take a tour of all of the schools in the area ~ private, several Catholic.  Not a Catholic, lol, she told me unequivocally that, yes, I needed to take my children on a tour of the local Catholic schools NOW because they are the best schools in the area.  Because of course her kids went there.   Her children graduated from high school long ago, but I never quite got my answer on what they were all doing now.  Wink

Anyway, the "conversation" (monologue?) continued until my friend saw me cornered.  Has this kind of thing happened to you ~ older mom telling you how to do it better?  How do you handle moms with children older than yours who are a little too liberal and pushy with their advices?  ....Have you ever been that mom?

Pages

Avatar for savcal2011
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2010
Sun, 10-20-2013 - 3:55pm

mortyswife wrote:
<p>Either people lie if they say they have never experienced this or they don't socialize very much.</p>

so the only ways for someone yo have experiences differet than yours are to either be lying or be a hermit. Oooohhhhhkay. 

"I don’t mind a banshee, that’s fine. 2 banshees? I HATE you. I actually wish bad things upon you." -- Day[9] Daily #459 P1

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Sun, 10-20-2013 - 4:14pm

mortyswife wrote:
<p>Either people lie if they say they have never experienced this or they don't socialize very much.</p>

Thank you!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Sun, 10-20-2013 - 4:17pm

savcal2011 wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">mortyswife</em> wrote:</div>&lt;p&gt;Either people lie if they say they have never experienced this or they don't socialize very much.&lt;/p&gt;</blockquote></p><p>so the only ways for someone yo have experiences differet than yours are to either be lying or be a hermit. Oooohhhhhkay. </p>

Actually, she's saying the opposite....Did you read her post?  Wasn't that complicated.

Avatar for jamblessedthree
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Sun, 10-20-2013 - 4:30pm

You're right morty, And these are people that claim to such diversity in their lives, Lol. I guess it takes all that level of difficulty and effort to find friends. 

 

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Sun, 10-20-2013 - 4:31pm

ashmama wrote:
<p>There are pushy controlling people in every neighborhood. Usually, I just nod and smile, but every once in a while I push back.</p><p>When we pulled our kids our of their very highly regarded public school and sent them to a lesser known Christian school, people thought we were nuts. Some actually said so. One of DH's former colleagues told me that we were "really missing out" by not sending our kids to the high school in our new town (we moved to be closer to their private school). She went on and on about how it was "number one in the state" (Funny, their old school was also number one. I guess there are a lot of number ones here.) and why would we settle for less than that for our children? I got a little annoyed and replied that their old school was also highly regarded, but that it hadn't been good enough for my kids because it did not meet their social, academic or spiritual needs. That shut her up. Sometimes you have to push back with a little snobbery of your own.</p><p> </p>

Oh, I can out-snob the best of them. Wink  I paid attention and asked non-leading, indifferent questions about her situation.  I'm way too confident we're doing what's best for our children.  So, I'm sure she left our little conversation having convinced me the schools her kids went to are the best, and boy am I going to re-think things come Monday.  The truth is she got sloppy drunk before the night was over, and her husband had to help her to the car. Wink  {{meow!}}

Anyway, you've handled it really well.  It's possible others are jealous you've thought outside the box and they didn't.  When they're paying $50,000/year in taxes or whatever, it can be hard to entertain the idea of using other than the public schools.  I admit, I initially presume the kids here who go to the private or parochial schools simply can't cut it in the public schools.  I think it, I don't say it.  In the end, I think every child will find his/her way to higher education.  And that's the ultimate goal. 

Avatar for jamblessedthree
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
Sun, 10-20-2013 - 4:33pm

There are pushy controlling people in every neighborhood. Usually, I just nod and smile, but every once in a while I push back

I figure some of them just need an ear to voice their lives too.  I agree, a smile and nodding to signal ok is enough. 

 

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Sun, 10-20-2013 - 6:17pm

jamblessedthree wrote:
<p>You're right morty, And these are people that claim to such diversity in their lives, Lol. I guess it takes all that level of difficulty and effort to find friends. </p><p> </p>

Perhaps we just choose our friends more wisely in real life?  There can be diversity without being around people who mock, belittle and generally are rude about friends differences.  Tolerance is an interesting concept that you might want to look into in your journey to become an adovcate.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2013
Sun, 10-20-2013 - 6:26pm

You're right morty, And these are people that claim to such diversity in their lives, Lol. I guess it takes all that level of difficulty and effort to find friends. 

But "I' don't know ANYONE different than myself. OMG bawhahhaaa....You know the MANY stories I have told about family and friends. If ANYONE knows a WIDE range of people (who are MUCH different than themselves) that person would be me. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2013
Sun, 10-20-2013 - 6:27pm

Perhaps we just choose our friends more wisely in real life? 

You DO realize that you can NOT choose family, right? AND...there are OTHER people but just friends in life, unless that is all you associate with on a daily basis.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Sun, 10-20-2013 - 6:54pm

mortyswife wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px">Perhaps we just choose our friends more wisely in real life? </span></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:13px">You DO realize that you can NOT choose family, right? AND...there are OTHER people but just friends in life, unless that is all you associate with on a daily basis.</span></strong></p>

You might note that my comments said nothing about family.  And of course there are other people that just friends, perhaps I just iive in a society that is generally nicer?  I tend to find that if I'm nice, than I get nice in return.  :)

PumpkinAngel

Pages