Moms who know better than you

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Moms who know better than you
1270
Sun, 10-20-2013 - 8:02am

Kind of joking there.  But the other day I met a mom who was certain she knew which area schools were the best.  I told her my children are happily in public school, but upon entering middle school and/or upon entering 8th grade, if any of mine wants, then we'll take a tour of all of the schools in the area ~ private, several Catholic.  Not a Catholic, lol, she told me unequivocally that, yes, I needed to take my children on a tour of the local Catholic schools NOW because they are the best schools in the area.  Because of course her kids went there.   Her children graduated from high school long ago, but I never quite got my answer on what they were all doing now.  Wink

Anyway, the "conversation" (monologue?) continued until my friend saw me cornered.  Has this kind of thing happened to you ~ older mom telling you how to do it better?  How do you handle moms with children older than yours who are a little too liberal and pushy with their advices?  ....Have you ever been that mom?

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 10-25-2013 - 3:44pm

mortyswifeee wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">I didn't do any run around, I have already explained my comments multiple times, what part of generaly and tend still isn't clear to you?   I stated in my first post in this thread that <strong>I have encountered people like this</strong>, please go back and read my comments if they are still unclear to you.</span></p><p style="text-align:left"><strong><span style="font-size:x-small"><span>Yes and you said you were just nice to them so they were nice to you. And? This is NOT what we are talking about.</span></span></strong></p>

No, that is not what I said.  Why do you keep repeating that same false statement over and over and over again...it doesn't make it any more true than the first time you stated it, all it shows is that you aren't reading the sentence correctly.  

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Fri, 10-25-2013 - 3:46pm

mortyswifeee wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">"So again, have you encountered the type of people WE have that you just can not be "nice" to them for them to change how they are towards you are anyone else. Please explain if your answer is yes." Of course, we all have. Several of them are on this board. When you run into people like that you deal with them on your own terms. In the case of board people, hang around as long as you are amused and having fun, and then go off and live your own life when it's no longer fun. In real life, it's harder of course, if you are related to those people or if you work for them, but generally you can work around those issues, as well. There is no constitutional requirement that anyone consort with toxic people against his or her own will.</span></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">There is NO ONE on this board as bad as what I have encountered. Even the sharp tongues is NOTHING close.</span></strong></p>

Well, if there is NO ONE on this board who has experienced what you have, then why are you asking people if they have.  Sounds as if your mind is made up.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2013
Fri, 10-25-2013 - 3:46pm

<<I don't know about you, but I'm generally not forced or confined in places where I don't have a choice of my company ,ymmv of course.  

So you really do NOT know what I am speaking of. >>

No, that's not what I'm saying so let me give you the definition of generally again.   http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/generally

No need for the definition. So you have been in those situations? Some examples?

<<And no your "seem to be inexperienced"  is not true.

Why not? Please explain. Do you have some examples?>>

Because it's a false, the opposite of true.  This is another case of your assuming before getting the facts, that is a poor choice again. 

So you have no examples?

<<No one is making up anything about your life. I asked a question. You have not answered it yet. >>

You are making assumptions about my life without facts, stop already.  I have answered all of your questions, it is not my fault that you choose not to read or comprehend what is written.

Nope no examples. Which leads me to believe you have none.


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 10-25-2013 - 3:46pm

mortyswifeee wrote:
<blockquote><div style="font-weight:bold"><em>mortyswifeee</em> wrote:</div>You are saying since you are nice, you receive nice responses. &lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</blockquote><p style="font-size:13px; text-align:left"></p><p style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">Generally. Tend to.</p><p style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">She hasn't stated or implied that this is always, with all people.</p><div style="color:#000000; font-family:Calibri, sans-serif; font-size:14px"><strong>Therefore I get a better response than someone who lol and mocks people, you might try it sometime.  :)</strong></div><div style="color:#000000; font-family:Calibri, sans-serif; font-size:14px"><strong><br /></strong></div><div style="color:#000000; font-family:Calibri, sans-serif; font-size:14px"><strong>Who said ANYTHING about mocking people. Jams and I were both talking about normal conversations and things IRL. I would love to hear examples if you keep saying "general" and "tend" which means that PKA TOTALLY understands what we are talking about. I will be waiting.</strong></div>

Mocking people is an example of being mean.  Yes, because it generally works, it tends to work...which means by definition that it doesn't work all the time.  That of course assumes that one is reading the comment correctly and understanding all of the words within the sentence.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 10-25-2013 - 3:48pm

mortyswifeee wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">Sure sounds like one...but good to know.  Why do you tell other people your stories, what purpose does that serve?</span></p><p style="text-align:left"><strong><span style="font-size:x-small"><span>What purpose? To know what I was going through. They are friends, family. They care.</span></span></strong></p><p style="text-align:left"><strong><span style="font-size:x-small"><span>So no stories from you? Sounds like you have been pretty lucky then. Don't think it is a competition as I have stated I would never wish this upon anyone. Actually one of my girlfriends is involved with the same "circle" so she comes to me now telling me what she is going through. </span></span></strong></p>

No, I see no purpose in sharing stories with you, none at all, in fact quite the opposite.  Just because I choose not to tell stories to a bunch of strangers on a public internet board, doesn't mean I don't have any.  

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 10-25-2013 - 3:50pm

mortyswifeee wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">I was asking for other peoples observations of the irony of that situation.  I have answered your questions, as I have said numerous times now, it was addressed in my original statements and has been addressed through my later statements.  You have simply chosen not to read those statements as written, instead interjecting your own language into those statements.  </span></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">Since you really have not, consider yourself quite lucky to not have to deal with the things I have. Again, I wouldn't wish it upon anyone. </span></strong></p>

Again, anyone who has read and understand the words in my comments would know that to be false.  I don't know why you continue to interject my comments with your own language that conflicts with my comments.  Perhaps if you have such an issue with mean and manipulative on a regular basis, you might with choose to change the group you hang out with or change your own behavior?  Just a suggestion.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2013
Fri, 10-25-2013 - 3:51pm

Well, if there is NO ONE on this board who has experienced what you have, then why are you asking people if they have.  Sounds as if your mind is made up.

From the examples I have heard (which seem to be NONE).

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Fri, 10-25-2013 - 3:52pm

mortyswifeee wrote:
<p>Why are you changing the subject PKA?</p>

What am I changing the subject...to?   I mean it's not like I tossed in manwhich, private schools or contractors into the discussion, lol.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-25-2013
Fri, 10-25-2013 - 3:54pm

Mocking people is an example of being mean. 

Ok, and? Who said ANYTHING about mocking anyone IRL?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Fri, 10-25-2013 - 3:55pm

mortyswifeee wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left"><strong>Well, if there is NO ONE on this board who has experienced what you have</strong>, then why are you asking people if they have.  Sounds as if your mind is made up.</span></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">From the examples I have heard (which seem to be NONE).</span></strong></p>

Nobody wants to share their stories with you. They are smarter than that.  If it makes you feel better somehow to be the Queen of the Misunderstood and Maltreated, you are welcome to the crown.   I hope that you're getting help for the many wounds you have suffered.

Pages