To Rant or Debate

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
To Rant or Debate
68
Wed, 06-23-2010 - 8:15am

in keeping with the tone of what GREATFULMOM shared, neighor kid who comes over to play with my 7 YO has assaulted me once again.

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2010
Wed, 06-23-2010 - 2:23pm
It might not be your job to teach him, but kids can learn lessons from many adults in their lives. If they won't learn it, they won't. If it sinks in a little that's good for everyone, especially your ceiling fan pull chains. ; )

“Clearly," said Arthur,"you're an idiot- but you're our kind of idiot. Come on.” 
― Markus ZusakThe Book Thief

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Wed, 06-23-2010 - 2:25pm
Of course it's not your "job"" but it would be a kind thing for you to do and even in your self-interest if the boy is going to continue to play at your house.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Wed, 06-23-2010 - 2:49pm
ok, i'll be sure to teach gentle the next time he's over, thanks.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Wed, 06-23-2010 - 2:53pm
There are many people who will tell you that their lives are better because one caring adult, neighbor, teacher,coach, whatever didn't give them up for lost when they were rambunctious children.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2006
Wed, 06-23-2010 - 3:13pm

i don't deny that exists.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Wed, 06-23-2010 - 3:19pm
Well, I don't put up with smart-aleckiness (let's pretend that's a word) from my kids or other kids. If a kid is rude I call them on it. If they are repeatedly rude, I might say soomething to the effect of, "I don't think you are in a mood to play nicelyy today, so I am afraid playtime is over. Let's try again tomorrow when everyone is in a more cooperative mood."
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2005
Wed, 06-23-2010 - 7:18pm

This is actually my parenting pet peeve, parents who think they know their kids well enough to know that if certain things occur, it could not have been their child doing it. As a child, I had a neighbor who blamed me for everything because she was so sure her little angel would never do it, since she did not do it when I wasn't around. The reality was that her little angel knew if she did it by herself, she'd get in trouble, if she did it with a sibling, she'd be told on, but if she did it while I was there, she had someone to blame.

I have also seen it as an adult, watching a situation unfold where little angel instigates, and then mom walks into the aftermath and assumes little angel was the innocent party. (neither child being mine).

And I have been in the situation where my child and another child are involved in a little spat and the other mother reprimands my child for doing what the other child did first to him.

I take the approach of never putting more blame on the other child than my own

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2010
Wed, 06-23-2010 - 8:36pm

Yes! Yes! Yes!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2009
Wed, 06-23-2010 - 8:37pm

I agree.

My children are angels compared to their friends (;-). Things happen in our home as we entertain a lot. Windows get broken, fences get inappropriately painted. My children know they are responsible for the behavior of their friends in our home. There are certain non-negotiables, no swimming without supervision, no media without our approval (wii, tv, computer), that some of their friends find draconian, but we still have a gaggle of children here daily. Maybe because my children are older, 10, 12, 15, they are self-policing; they don't invite friends over who can't follow our rules.

Accidents happens - we're cool with that, defiance to our rules gets a punishment. It doesn't matter if our kid or the friend did the deed, same consequences.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2010
Wed, 06-23-2010 - 8:47pm

My children know they are responsible for the behavior of their friends in our home. .... Maybe because my children are older, 10, 12, 15, they are self-policing; they don't invite friends over who can't follow our rules.


Same at our house.

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