Sexy Underwear for Teens

Avatar for Cmmelissa
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Sexy Underwear for Teens
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Tue, 04-02-2013 - 3:44pm

I only have boys, so while I have an opinion on this, wanted to see how the moms of teen girls feel about store's such as Victoria's Secret carrying lines of sexy underwear that are for college aged girls, but appeal to a teen audience.  They were recently targeted by moms for their "Bright Young Things" spring break line.  From Time.com: 

But should anyone be walking around in undies that declare “Dare You,” “Call Me” or “Feeling Lucky?” like some of the missives printed on the manufacturer’s spring-break inventory? That’s certainly a matter of personal taste — for adults. But for young girls, “This speaks to the idea that girls have a fantasy of being raped, that women on some level are asking for it,” says Dana Udall-Weiner, a Santa Fe, N.M., psychologist who works with girls on body image.

Read more: http://healthland.time.com/2013/03/29/bright-young-things-victorias-secrets-line-under-fire/#ixzz2PKwj8Dqz

Would you let your teen wear suggestive underwear?  Do you think that teen girls have a right to feel confident and sexy, or are they getting the wrong message from retailers?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 10:39am

springfever2013 wrote:
<blockquote><div style="font-weight:bold"><em>springfever2013</em> wrote:</div>Not sure what a "nice" girl has to do with the type of underwear she wears lol.</blockquote><p style="font-size:13px; text-align:left"></p><p style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">IDK, I think if a teen has underwear that states she is sexually available, wouldn't that meant they were?  </p><p style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">Ummm...no PKA. And if she is with a boy and gets down to her underwear then it wouldn't matter if she had a saying on her underwear or granny panties, she is willing to have sex. I would not go by the underwear to say WHO is easier with sex. </p>

So then why the message on the undies?

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 10:40am

savcal2011 wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">springfever2013</em> wrote:</div>We are not speaking of these sayings on the OUTSIDE of their clothes on their crotches but on underwear that for the most part are ONLY seen by the person wearing it.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt;</blockquote></p><p>I don't care if my dd is the only one that knows what her underwear says. I don't want her feeling or thinking that way about herself.  Don't think any good can come of that.</p><p> </p>

Amen.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 10:41am

springfever2013 wrote:
A G-String would be butt floss lol</span></p>

When Savcal (?) wrote that, I was thinking of Granny panties.  They sound like they bunch and become butt floss!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2013
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 10:42am

One of my boys is in his mid-teens and one is in his early twenties. I know that by the end of my older son's junior year, he'd been "sexted" - girls sent him "sexy underwear" or even topless pics, holing he'd be interested. He was appalled and a little scared. The last thing he wants is a "sex offender" classification.


I think I would be a little worried that my teenage/adult would be appalled and a little scared of girls lol. Not that I agree with sexting AT ALL. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 10:44am

thardy2001 wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">pumpkinangel</em> wrote:</div>&lt;p&gt;&amp;lt;&amp;lt;&lt;span&gt;I don't know why your focus is only on the girl.  Again, if a boy actually reads them, it means he is sexually available. &amp;gt;&amp;gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span&gt;You might want to re-read my comments, it was a question as was the follow up post.  Let me ask it again, if a teen has underwear that states she is sexually available, woudn't that mean they were?  How does the random boy who can read come into the discussion?&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span&gt;&lt;br /&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;</blockquote></p><p>PKA, p13: ""<strong>If the underwear and sexual invitations on them, yes I would say that</strong>""</p><p>I've read your comments.  I particularly find your use p13 of the term "sexual invitations" to be offensive for the reasons I've stated.  You can re-read my comments on that.  You're the only mom here who has used that very off-putting term "sexual invitations." If the underwear and sexual invitations on them, yes I would say that. </p>

 So you do agree that if a teen has underwear that states she is sexually available, woudn't that mean they were?  

Again, you might want to re-read my comments and then put them into context.  The comment that you are quoting was in direct response to jambles comment about "rocking underwear" being trashy if they have sexual invites on them.  And no, I'm not the only mom here who has used the term sexual invitiations.

Edited to add:  It looks like you edited out the last comment as it no longer appears...interesting.


PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 10:46am

springfever2013 wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">One of my boys is in his mid-teens and one is in his early twenties. I know that by the end of my older son's junior year, he'd been "sexted" - girls sent him "sexy underwear" or even topless pics, holing he'd be interested. He was appalled and a little scared. The last thing he wants is a "sex offender" classification.</span></p><p><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left"><br /></span></p><p><strong><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">I think I would be a little worried that my teenage/adult would be appalled and a little scared of girls lol. Not that I agree with sexting AT ALL. </span></strong></p>

You don't agree with sexting but if you son has a good moral response to sexting you would be worried and then laugh out loud at them?    

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 10:48am

pumpkinangel wrote:
 

 So you do agree that if a teen has underwear that states she is sexually available, woudn't that mean they were?  </span></p><p><span style="font-size:small"><span>Again, you might want to re-read my comments and then put them into context.  The comment that you are quoting was in direct response to jambles comment about "rocking underwear" being trashy if they have sexual invites on them.</span><span>  And no, I'm not the only mom here who has used the term sexual invitiations.</span></span></p>

Your use of the term "Sexual Invitations" says it all.  The outdated thought process that what a woman wears opens her up to rape or even just consensual sex is so archaic, the courts and then legislatures  stepped in where the juries were too dim-witted.  Thankfully.   You agree?  A woman does not open herself up to rape just because her shirt says the words, Dare you.  That is not a defense to rape.  It means the man goes to jail.  Don't you agree?

And there have never been excuses in the law or in fact for boys who have juvenile, backward thinking brains.  Like Bord says, This is the 21st century.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2011
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 10:49am
My kid's first concern would be for the girl, probably worried about getting her into trouble. I'm not sure why that that reaction should be something for a parent to worry about.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 10:52am

pumpkinangel wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">thardy2001</em> wrote:</div>&lt;p&gt;&lt;blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"&gt;&lt;div class="quote-author"&gt;&lt;em class="placeholder"&gt;pumpkinangel&lt;/em&gt; wrote:&lt;/div&gt;&amp;lt;p&amp;gt;&amp;amp;lt;&amp;amp;lt;&amp;lt;span&amp;gt;I don't know why your focus is only on the girl.  Again, if a boy actually reads them, it means he is sexually available. &amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;gt;&amp;lt;/span&amp;gt;&amp;lt;/p&amp;gt;&amp;lt;p&amp;gt;&amp;lt;span&amp;gt;You might want to re-read my comments, it was a question as was the follow up post.  Let me ask it again, if a teen has underwear that states she is sexually available, woudn't that mean they were?  How does the random boy who can read come into the discussion?&amp;lt;/span&amp;gt;&amp;lt;/p&amp;gt;&amp;lt;p&amp;gt;&amp;lt;span&amp;gt;&amp;lt;br /&amp;gt; &amp;lt;/span&amp;gt;&amp;lt;/p&amp;gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;PKA, p13: ""&lt;strong&gt;If the underwear and sexual invitations on them, yes I would say that&lt;/strong&gt;""&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;I've read your comments.  I particularly find your use p13 of the term "sexual invitations" to be offensive for the reasons I've stated.  You can re-read my comments on that.  You're the only mom here who has used that very off-putting term "sexual invitations." <span>If the underwear and sexual invitations on them, yes I would say that.</span><span> &lt;/p&gt;</blockquote></span></p><p><span style="font-size:small; background-color:#f6f6f6"> So you do agree that if a teen has underwear that states she is sexually available, woudn't that mean they were?  </span></p><p><span style="font-size:small"><span>Again, you might want to re-read my comments and then put them into context.  The comment that you are quoting was in direct response to jambles comment about "rocking underwear" being trashy if they have sexual invites on them.</span><span>  And no, I'm not the only mom here who has used the term sexual invitiations.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size:small"><span>Edited to add:  It looks like you edited out the last comment as it no longer appears...interesting.</span></span></p><p><span style="font-size:small"><span><br /></span></span></p>

If the underwear and sexual invitations on them, yes I would say that.

Yes, I mistakenly repeated your comment If the underwear and sexual invitations on them, yes I would say that and you put it back in.  I told you it was on p.13.

Are you now retreating from your repeated use of the term "Sexual Invitations"?  About words like Dare you on underwear.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 10:52am
According to a study of Utah teens published last year in the journal "Archives of Sexual Behavior," 20% of high school teens admitted texting sexually explicit photos of themselves, and 40% admitted to receiving them. About half the boys who received photos of girls admitted to forwarding them to other boys. Now I think these numbers are high. But even if its half that, it's something to think about. Your daughter may not want panties that say "call me" or "dare you" on them so she can look at herself in the mirror or impress other girls in the locker room. She may be buying sexy-wear. Either she is sexting, or she at least wants the other girls to think she is. You know, a month or so ago a few of you got the vapors because I reported that some kids had broken school rules and done a little drinking at a dance. But I have to say, those of you defending this kind of product are coming across as pretty naive. You are part of the problem.

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