Sexy Underwear for Teens

Avatar for Cmmelissa
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Sexy Underwear for Teens
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Tue, 04-02-2013 - 3:44pm

I only have boys, so while I have an opinion on this, wanted to see how the moms of teen girls feel about store's such as Victoria's Secret carrying lines of sexy underwear that are for college aged girls, but appeal to a teen audience.  They were recently targeted by moms for their "Bright Young Things" spring break line.  From Time.com: 

But should anyone be walking around in undies that declare “Dare You,” “Call Me” or “Feeling Lucky?” like some of the missives printed on the manufacturer’s spring-break inventory? That’s certainly a matter of personal taste — for adults. But for young girls, “This speaks to the idea that girls have a fantasy of being raped, that women on some level are asking for it,” says Dana Udall-Weiner, a Santa Fe, N.M., psychologist who works with girls on body image.

Read more: http://healthland.time.com/2013/03/29/bright-young-things-victorias-secrets-line-under-fire/#ixzz2PKwj8Dqz

Would you let your teen wear suggestive underwear?  Do you think that teen girls have a right to feel confident and sexy, or are they getting the wrong message from retailers?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2013
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 10:54am

And if they boy/girl in question are getting intimate, and she says "No" ... what's to prevent some boys from saying "but her underwear says 'yes'."?   Yeah, it sounds silly, but this is exactly the kind of thing that perpetuates the "but she asked for it" or "but she was dressed like a tramp" defenses in cases of date rape.


Seriously? A girl can wear granny panties and get raped. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2000
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 10:54am

springfever2013 wrote:
<p><span style="font-size:13px; text-align:left">"Maybe it's "no biggie." Or maybe we've just all collectively lowered our standards. I'd still prefer my children not to use their bodies as free billboard space for corporate logos. Luckily, neither of them is interested in doing so."</span></p><p style="text-align:left"><strong><span style="font-size:x-small"><span>We are not speaking of these sayings on the OUTSIDE of their clothes on their crotches but on underwear that for the most part are ONLY seen by the person wearing it.</span></span></strong></p>

You've missed some posts, then, because in the post to which she was responding, we were talking about clothes that are seen by anyone.


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 10:57am

springfever2013 wrote:
  Ummm...no PKA. And if she is with a boy and gets down to her underwear then it wouldn't matter if she had a saying on her underwear or granny panties, she is willing to have sex. I would not go by the underwear to say WHO is easier with sex. </p>

And if she's with a boy, he's sexually available and committing statutory rape.  He goes to jail.  And if the parents choose, they can scratch their heads.  Or accept this is not about words on underpants.  Far from it!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 11:00am

thardy2001 wrote:
<p><blockquote class="quote-msg quote-nest-1 odd"><div class="quote-author"><em class="placeholder">pumpkinangel</em> wrote:</div> </p><p> So you do agree that if a teen has underwear that states she is sexually available, woudn't that mean they were?  &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:small"&gt;&lt;span&gt;Again, you might want to re-read my comments and then put them into context.  The comment that you are quoting was in direct response to jambles comment about "rocking underwear" being trashy if they have sexual invites on them.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;span&gt;  And no, I'm not the only mom here who has used the term sexual invitiations.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;</blockquote></p><p>Your use of the term "Sexual Invitations" says it all.  The outdated thought process that what a woman wears opens her up to rape or even just consensual sex is so archaic, the courts and then legislatures  stepped in where the juries were too dim-witted.  Thankfully.   You agree?  A woman does not open herself up to rape just because her shirt says the words, Dare you.  That is not a defense to rape.  It means the man goes to jail.  Don't you agree?</p><p>And there have never been excuses in the law or in fact for boys who have juvenile, backward thinking brains.  Like Bord says, This is the 21st century.</p>

No, no it doesn't say it all....what says it all is your defense of this underwear with this type of message for you young children.  For you to twist my words/comments into something else as horrible as rape is well, horrible and a new low.  I'm once again shocked at the twists into fiction, appalled really.   Try reading my comments as they are written, answer my questions and then lets discuss the reality not this horrible fictional novel that you have written.

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 11:00am

bordwithyou wrote:
According to a study of Utah teens published last year in the journal "Archives of Sexual Behavior," 20% of high school teens admitted texting sexually explicit photos of themselves, and 40% admitted to receiving them. About half the boys who received photos of girls admitted to forwarding them to other boys. Now I think these numbers are high. But even if its half that, it's something to think about. Your daughter may not want panties that say "call me" or "dare you" on them so she can look at herself in the mirror or impress other girls in the locker room. She may be buying sexy-wear. Either she is sexting, or she at least wants the other girls to think she is. You know, a month or so ago a few of you got the vapors because I reported that some kids had broken school rules and done a little drinking at a dance. But I have to say, those of you defending this kind of product are coming across as pretty naive. You are part of the problem.

There is a lot of naivete on this subject.  Thankfully it is the 21st century.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2002
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 11:02am

I can't now.  I have tennis.  I will be back.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-1998
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 11:03am

<<If the underwear and sexual invitations on them, yes I would say that.

Yes, I mistakenly repeated your comment If the underwear and sexual invitations on them, yes I would say that and you put it back in.  I told you it was on p.13.

Are you now retreating from your repeated use of the term "Sexual Invitations"?  About words like Dare you on underwear.>>

Yes, I said that in if my children came up as Jambles suggested about the "rocking underwear" in the locker room, I would tell my kids they are trashy.  Yep, that's what I said, go look at page 13 and see the quote that I responded to and stop taking my words and comments out of context and twisting them into whatever horrible fiction you are trying to create.  Just stop already.  

PumpkinAngel

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2013
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 11:03am

1. Teen Mom started as Pregnant and 16 years ago so this is nothing new

2. Teen mom's are nothing new either and they didn't have this type of underwear with sayings on it many, many years ago when women our parents and grandparents age and above became teen moms. 

Blaming the underwear on a girl being "easy" is just ridiculous.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 11:03am
Sorry, receiving a picture of a woman in a bra and panties with the words "call me" over her vulva IS a sexual invitation. That invite may later be withdrawn. But it does make it a little more complicated to tell your sons about how "No means no" when they get invites like these.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
Wed, 04-03-2013 - 11:05am
The underwear doesn't make the girl "easy." It's just that "easy" girls are the kind most likely to chops this kind of underwear.

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