Surprises in parenting

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Surprises in parenting
48
Fri, 04-02-2010 - 7:43pm
What surprises have you had in parenting?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2009
Sat, 04-03-2010 - 5:50pm
My sister and I are very (VERY) different.

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Ducky

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2009
Sat, 04-03-2010 - 5:52pm
You ever see a family that is very much a like but there is one "odd ball" that just doesn't seem to fit. That be me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-09-2009
Sat, 04-03-2010 - 5:52pm
There are differences that, had I only had my oldest two kids, that I would have chalked up to being gender.

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Ducky

Avatar for mom34101
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Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 04-03-2010 - 6:05pm
Lol about the gun. That's something that surprised me, too. Before having kids I thought it was more about nurture than nature, even beyond gender differences. I now realize nature is at least an equal force.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2008
Sat, 04-03-2010 - 6:52pm
That's why I said in my family. I know some people have different experiences, but we have 4 boys and 2 girls and there are clear gender lines. Even with my twins, exposing them to the same things in the beginning. The first time they got ahold of ODD's necklaces, YDD put it on and smiled at herself in the mirrored closet door. DS grabbed one and started swinging it around like it was a weapon. Eventually DS started wearing them like the girls, but it took a good long time before he began to conform. There are lots of examples like that in my family. The boys begin amassing weaponry as soon as they can walk. The girls, start caring about their outfits about the same time.

"The last of human freedoms - the ability to choose one's attitude in a given set of circumstances." - Viktor Frankl.



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"The key to good decision making is not knowledge. It is understanding."
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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2009
Sat, 04-03-2010 - 9:23pm

Maybe I'm missing something. I have 1 girl and 2 boys. They are distinct personalities, but gender is not a huge factor in who they are or how we choose to raise them. I agree that nature plays a big role, but gender not as much.

There are no guns in our household, but all 3 love laser tag and paintball. Two love math, two love to read, two love art and music, two tell me everything, one I have to pry open. All have a passionate interest in competitive sports. We do nurture some interests better than others, e.g. sports as opposed to music (tone deaf parents), but we try our best. (Except for hockey, one kid tried hockey, liked it, but when it got competitive, I dropped out with teeny tiny bit of regret, kid got over it because basketball was better)

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2008
Sat, 04-03-2010 - 10:32pm

You aren't missing anything - it's not the same in every family. But if you want to see huge gender differences come to my house. I didn't just have b/g twins, I gave birth to a caveman and a princess. Literally. We ARE the stereotype.

My two are learning their ABC's, ds *grunts* them, forcefully demanding in his deepest possible voice that next time won't. you. sing. with. me. grrrrrr!!! He spends his day hunting, fighting and patrolling on his big wheel. DD spends her day gathering, gathering, gathering, storing what she's gathered in purses and backpacks, changing her outfit, checking her look in the mirror and gathering some more. They aren't even 3 yet.

"The last of human freedoms - the ability to choose one's attitude in a given set of circumstances." - Viktor Frankl.



Photobucket



Photobucket



Ten Rules for Being Human



"The key to good decision making is not knowledge. It is understanding."
Malcolm Gladwell Blink

Avatar for rollmops2009
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Registered: 02-24-2009
Sun, 04-04-2010 - 2:11am
We are alike, I think. I found the baby/toddler stuff so immensely much worse and more stressful than the teen stuff. If is not that the teen thing doesn't drive me to distraction sometimes, but it is not hope-killing in the same way that the baby/toddler years were (for me that is).

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What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce.

Mark Twain

Avatar for rollmops2009
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Registered: 02-24-2009
Sun, 04-04-2010 - 2:21am

My favorite in that department was a gaggle of three old ladies who always sat on the bench outside my supermarket.

When I waddled by, 9 months pregnant, it was,

"Be happy dear. Now is your chance to sleep, because once that baby is born ..."

Baby was born, and I would walk by,

"Be happy, because once that baby starts walking, you won't have a minute of rest!"

Baby started walking,

"You see dear, but enjoy it for now, because you know, soon that baby will start talking and you won't have a moment's peace."

It was normal child development seen as a never-ending succession of calamities. Very sort of uplifting @@.

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What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce.

Mark Twain

Avatar for rollmops2009
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2009
Sun, 04-04-2010 - 2:23am
Ha! Yeah, I had great faith in nurture. That lasted till the kiddo was maybe 6 weeks old.

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What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce.

Mark Twain