Teens and Jobs

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
Teens and Jobs
26
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 8:21am
I've been thinking about this for a while:

At what age do you make your kids go to work? Just a summer job or during school? I grew up with a dad whose mentality was "If I had to do it, you do to" So, when I was 12 I was washing dishes in a diner Saturday and Sunday breakfasts starting at 6 am, $20 a day under the table. It was a nightmare...so I won't do the same thing to our kids, guarenteed. BUT, I am going to my nephew's grad party this weekend and I think the kid in in for a world of hurt. He has never had to have a job, his parents have handed everything to him and now he is on his way to college. I expect massive credit-card debt by the time he graduates. And then, he'll need a job, but he'll have no idea how to interview or conduct himself at work, because he won't have had those teenage "practice" jobs.

So, what do you think? Tell the kids to concentrate on school-work only and extra-curriculars and no job? Or, get a job on the weekends or work everyday if you want as long as you grades don't suffer?

When I reached highschool, I worked in a pizza place Tuesday and Friday nights, all day Saturday and Sunday. I still managed to have fun and do well in school and play sports, etc. I got into good colleges. Is that impossible these days?

Meldi

Meldi

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: meldi
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 8:33am
Our rule was we are responsible for your needs until you are 18 and have graduatd high school so you do not have to get a job but you can if you want to.

But I have changed a bit on that. DD2 went job hunting over spring break for a summer job her senior year. She was offered a job but they wanted her to start immediately. She was afraid if she turned the job down she would not get another one so she took it. Those last few weeks of school were very rough. So my new rule is that DD3 can get a summer job while still in high school but cannot work during the school year.

Once out of high school they do need to work to cover their expences. If they are in college when we will help because it is hard to go to college full time and work enough hours to cover all expences. If they are not in college then they are financially on their own. We pay DD1 and DD2 auto insurance and cell phone bills, medical, books and part of their tuition. They take care of the rest of their expences.

Avatar for mom2evan2000
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: meldi
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 9:30am
My parents bought me a car when I was sixteen - we lived quite a ways from the HS I attended and was very involved in sports and after school activities. Both parents worked, so transportation was an issue. However - I had to pay for gas - and part of my insurance, so I did get a job. I worked in a local pizza place about 15 hours a week - and babysat through HS.

While my parents did have the $$ to "support" me, I do know that it taught me a valuable lesson in the "value of the ole' mighty dollar." I remember wanting these pair of acid-washed Guess jeans with the zippers at the ankles in high school - anyone from the 80's remember those? LOL! - but they were $50.00! While my parents did buy me clothing throughout the year, this was a lot of money to pay for jeans back then. I remember buying them on my own - and it was a great feeling. I took such good care of those jeans! LMBO!

Although my son is little - I would encourage him to get a job - as long as it doesn't interfere with homework and obligations they he may have. I know teenagers who I think their parents are setting them up for financial failure (my babysitter being one who parents pay her $400.00 American Express bill every month) AND a workforce coming out of college who expects to start at $80,000.00 a year because they don't know the meaning of "working your way up" or any previous job skills, at all.

Avatar for jbnick
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: meldi
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 10:39am
I didn't work in high school.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: meldi
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 11:01am
My kids will work in the summers once they're 16.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-15-2003
In reply to: meldi
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 11:14am
I don't think it's a *problem* persay, if you don't expect your children to work..obviously you turned out fine. With the nephew though, he wasn't expected to do anything..grades just enough to pass, barely able to get into college, but he had a brand new car (but wasn't expected to bring his little brother anywhere) they pay for everything, clothes, expensive vacations, etc. He definately thinks that money falls from the sky. I think that a lot of teens these days expect to pick up where their parents left off... and that creates the massive credit card debt that a lot of young people are carrying around these days. They don't know how to manage money, nor do they know the value of the dollar.

I will expect my kids to work while they are in school. I will probably do something similar to my mom regarding school clothes...she would give me a certain amount, once in the fall, once in the spring, anything I wanted above that I had to provide. It definately taught me how to shop and bargain hunt! My parents also bought me a car... $300 Escort station wagon (remember those?) but only so I could drive myself to work. I had to pay for the gas and insurance.

My parents were not poor, really. My dad made some good money, but he kept it all to himself, kwim? The *family* was poor by default.

My pizza place job was one of my favorites. I learned a lot about having a good work ethic and being organized. It was part of my *education*, if you will.

Meldi

Meldi
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
In reply to: meldi
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 11:30am

This is something that will totally depend on the specific kids I have, and what they have going on.

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
In reply to: meldi
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 11:33am
I won't expect my children to cover their own needs. I will, however, expect them to be responsible for their own *wants*. If that means they have to get a job to fulfill those wants, so be it. As long as that job does not interfere with their school performance.

Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color.  Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
In reply to: meldi
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 11:35am

The key word in your post is, imo, *need*.


I plan to be responsible for my kids *needs* until they are 18, and even somewhat after that (we have college funds). However, I will *NOT* be responsible for my kids *wants* past about the age of 15. If they *want* to buy a new video game, or go on a shopping spree, or eat out at lunch every day, etc .. then they will be responsible for that. They can get a job for that excess spending money. If they need a job to be able to meet their own wants, then they can get a job. But that job cannot interfere with school.

Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color.  Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: meldi
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 11:36am

Funny, I just talked to my dd last night about this. She is 13 and just started some very minimal babysitting and such. I told her that next summer, when she is 14, I will let her get a job if she wants. I told her that as long as her grades remain marginal, she wont be allowed to work during the school year-and thats something she might want to think about because not having money when she is 16 is going to affect things like being able to drive, etc.


If my kids have and maintain good grades, I dont mind them working during the school year if THEY want to. I wouldnt expect or insist in any way, and I certainly wouldnt refuse to give them spending money and such while they are still in school.


Dj

"Now when I need help, I look in the mirror" ~Kanye West~

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: meldi
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 11:50am
Good idea, Felicia.

I worked from the time I was 13, and all throughout high school. Unfortunately, my income was required even as a teen to help support the household. What I earned wasn't fun money or even colleg tuition money...it went toward groceries, rent, etc (my parents were a mess). Fortunately, I still managed to do very well in school...PHEW!

I want my son to be able to focus on academics and extracurriculars during the school year. He's banking on becoming a counselor at the camp he goes to when he's old enough...in about 7 more years :)

- Christine

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