WWYD?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-1999
WWYD?
8
Mon, 06-21-2004 - 2:35pm
So, I got a phone call about half an hour ago. I recognized the number, as it has been on caller id lately, but w/no message. I answered and a woman asked for me. She introduced herself and said that FIL had given her my name as he thought I'd be interested in her company/WAH. WTF? I've made it perfectly clear to FIL numerous times that I'm quite happy as a SAHM. I spent all day w/that man yesterday and he didn't say one word to me about this. I AM SO ANGRY! I've left DH numerous messages (he's in a meeting), and if he knew about this (I suspect he didn't), he's sleeping on the couch for a while. I was completely blindsided by the phone call!

I want DH to tell FIL to get the hell out of our marriage and leave my work status the hell alone. What do you think? WWYD?

C

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2001
In reply to: mygarnetboy
Mon, 06-21-2004 - 2:44pm

I agree, Christi.

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
In reply to: mygarnetboy
Mon, 06-21-2004 - 2:45pm
My opinion? You're right; he's wrong. He sounds very controlling, so I think what I'd do is ignore it. Never even mention it. Drives controllers crazy. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2000
In reply to: mygarnetboy
Mon, 06-21-2004 - 2:53pm

I would simply tell the woman I wasn't interested.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
In reply to: mygarnetboy
Mon, 06-21-2004 - 3:10pm

I'd drop it.


It's possible that your FIL said to her "My DIL needs some income. She's a SAH now but needs to earn some money. Why don't you call her about this. Here's her number."


It's also possible that your FIL simply said "I have a DIL who is a SAHM." and the "saleslady" then jumped on that chance to drop his name to you ... thinking you'd see that as a positive thing.

Choose your friends by their character and your socks by their color.  Choosing your socks by their character makes no sense and choosing your friends by their color is unthinkable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: mygarnetboy
Mon, 06-21-2004 - 3:14pm
I wouldn't be angry, I'd just blow it off.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2003
In reply to: mygarnetboy
Mon, 06-21-2004 - 4:47pm
Why is your FIL concerned about your work status? Does he think you guys are hurting financially? Did your MIL work so he thinks this is the way it should be for everyone?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: mygarnetboy
Mon, 06-21-2004 - 6:33pm
Weeeeeeeeellllllllll, after about thirty years of putting up with my in-laws crap, i just dont talk to them, nor do i go see them when in nj. cant be bothered, tired, have had it. i know how you feel, and unfortunately, i think they think because you're "part of the family", they can say whatever the hell they plz. not with this dil anymore. im done.

p.s. cant wait to see how *they* react when i dont open the b-day card they send me next week.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: mygarnetboy
Tue, 06-22-2004 - 8:45am
Let it go. It was just a phone call from a telemarketer, not a lifestyle report card from your family. It really shouldn't be a big deal to anyone, and I'm sure it wasn't to your the perpetrator. I doubt it was like, crowding his mind and he was consciously trying to avoid mentionning anything to you. And it shouldn't have been. He probably answered a question along the lines of "do you know any sahm who would like an opportunity to earn a little extra money"? You have to realize how these things work at this point in your life don't you? I don't think the question he answered was "Do you know of any sahms who you feel are harming their family by refusing to work, and who would do well to earn extra income for that family? Do you have son who is being taken advantage of by a rtws (refuse to work spouse). Or any daughters in law who are unhappy and stiffled at home, suffering with out any financial independance? Or any who are just plain lazy and need to get off their duffs in order to do something constructive?" You are making in-law trouble here, where there really is none.