BM and DH are talking modifying the order

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2009
BM and DH are talking modifying the order
Thu, 02-28-2013 - 2:19pm

DH and BM are talking about modifying the order, BM mentions that SD7 has said that she wants to split Christmas day and thanksgiving day with BM and DH. the next weekend we had SD7 we asked her about it and SD7 had no clue what we were talking about and actually said thats sounds aweful, and would like to wait until the next day like we are already doing... I think this is a classic "It's for the children" stuff our BM likes to pull, when in reality she wants it and will try to lie to get her way.  its her usual ways... Does anyone here deal with this? Do you think that switching Christmas and Thanksgiving day at noon is good or the next day?

I think the next day switch is best. We usually do lunch at my mom's andthen dinner with my FIL, since my mom lives in our neighborhood and his dad is a little further away. So if we do day of switch she will miss out seeing her grandfather... besides If SD7 leaves our house at noon, on christmas her toys will get left until NEXT visit, which could easily be 2 weeks. if we switch the next day she will at least be able to open and play with everything ONCE before she goes to her mom's house.

Community Leader
Registered: 07-26-1999
Thu, 02-28-2013 - 3:06pm

There is a reason that the "normal" visitation schedule has the kids switching off every other year Christmas Eve and Christmas day with each parent if they are local, for those types of situations.  Its so hard on a child to be carted around on a holiday back and forth between two parent's houses.  I would just say that you don't feel its the best for hte child, and if she'd like to go to court for it and spend the money, then you are happy to let the judge decide things.  I can't imagine unless its extenuating circumstances why a judge would agree to something like that.