Family vacations?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-10-2006
Family vacations?
Wed, 12-06-2006 - 1:19pm
Should family vacations only be scheduled when all the children can go? In instances of long distance visitation should the parents refrain from going on trips during time frames when they don't have visitation with the first marriage children? Should parents who have primary custody willingly allow the children to go on a family vacation not scheduled on the other parents time?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Wed, 12-06-2006 - 1:25pm

No, family vacations shouldn't be limited to time that all the children are together. DH and I live 1200 miles from SD and could never afford to go on a family vacation with SD because we already spend about $1000 to fly her to us (DH has to fly with her the entire way).

We have yet to take a family vacation, but I would suspect that until SD is old enough to fly by herself (according to the decree, that's 12) and our expenses associated with that are cut by 66%, family vacations will be taken without her. Once she CAN fly by herself, we can just fly her to wherever we're going to be so taking a family vacation with her will be MUCH easier.

DH has plenty of visitation time to schedule a family vacation, so I can't ever see the need to ask CP for more time to take a vacation. I know that's not the case for parents who live close together and do the EOW thing, but DH has practically the entire summer with SD, so we have plenty of time to schedule a vacation without interfering with CP's time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 12-06-2006 - 2:48pm

I think yes. My girls are with their father EOW, and I only plan "adult" (I know that sounds dirty, but you know what I mean) weekends when they are gone with him.

We have our vacatino schedule spelled out in our Agreement, who gets which school vacations, and if he wishes to take the 2 weeks allowed summer vacation, he has to tell me by Jan 1 of that year what weeks he wishes to take.

BF and I plan our vacations when all of our children can go, or all of them are not going to go (again, "adult" weekends). We would never go to Disney with my kids, and not his, because it's a weekend or week she's with her mother.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2004
Wed, 12-06-2006 - 2:53pm

No, not all the time. DH and I try our best to include DSD in our vacations, but since I am only 4 months pregos with our first together, we also have tried to find time to take our own *private* vacations.

Having said that, we have had some issues with trying to include DSD in our vcation plans and have been turned down by bio-mom since it will "interfere with school". We simply leave these issues alone and either go on our own or try to find a better time for all of us to go and be included.

With a new little one on the way, we plan to take alternating vacations, one with just us as a couple and one with both children.

It all depends on schedules and how willing everyone is to make things fit together!


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 12-06-2006 - 2:56pm

Just out of curiousity (because in my situation, we will not have an "ours" child, just mine and yours... so,

would you guys take your "own" child to Disney without "his" child coming along?