How do I deal with this?
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|Sat, 09-25-2010 - 1:00pm|
I'm not trying to be antagonistic. I would like feedback from both sides.
My stbx is dating a woman who is 15 years younger than he is. They started dating right after we separated (or maybe before). She seems like a very odd choice for him. She is unattractive and very unsophisticated. I think she is very insecure and feels enamored with this seemingly sophisticated, handsome and successful older man. From what I know, she is also very immature and believes his one dimensional explanation of the failure of our marriage. I'm sure he is dating her because he believes he can be on control with her. Sad, really.
Here is the problem. Stbx and I have a dd 6. She will be living with me during the week and him on the weekend. We are structuring a very unusual co where we both spend a lot of time together with dd. All holidays all together etc. This is what we believe to be best for dd and we can make it work.
At this time, have nothing against this girl stbx is with. However, I'm concerned about the fact hat she is from such a radically different background and has such a radically different perspective on life that I and stbx have. If she is willing and able to understand how we are raising our daughter (education, experience etc) or at least willing to learn, there shouldn't be a problem. However, if she is incapable of understanding or learning, I'm concerned about the impact of her resistance on dd. I firmly believe that dd needs to feel like all of the adults in her life are "on the same page" with her upbringing.
I suppose there is nothing I can do right now but this is such a strange part of all of getting a divorce. When we get married and seek out friends we try to find people who share our values. It is disturbing to think of dd spending time with someone who doesn't share my values and general view of life.