How do you handle the Easter Bunny?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
How do you handle the Easter Bunny?
15
Wed, 03-28-2012 - 3:19pm

I was curious how you all handle circumstances that involve imaginery characters, such as the Easter Bunny, Santa or the Tooth Fairy.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
Wed, 03-28-2012 - 3:29pm
I always do baskets. If ex wants to add something, he will get it to me or give me money to buy it.

For Christmas, we always coordinate, and at their current ages, that makes even more sense because of the high cost of items they want (laptop, ipod, kindle, etc).

Ex is very happy with this arrangement, as it is just not his thing. I would not be willing to give up those things if ex got married, lost his mind and wanted new steppie to take over.

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2009
Thu, 03-29-2012 - 9:58am

When you say let the steppie take over do you mean you would not be willing to allow your ex's wife to help him buy the kid's presents for his house for christmas or easter, or do you mean you would not be willing to allow his new wife to help chip in on your baskets, or not willing to allow the wife to take over and buy the baskets and not allow you to do it at all?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2009
Thu, 03-29-2012 - 10:00am

we just do separate holidays, easter and christmas here and easter and christmas there... Santa and the Easter Bunny knows that the child plays at BOTH houses and BOTH families want to have the freedom of seeing the child get SO excited over toys or gifts they got them.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
Thu, 03-29-2012 - 10:13am
I would not be willing to give up the things I do for my children so that a new steppie could do it instead. Nor would I allow a steppie on my side to take over the things ex does for/with our children.

Steps are great...in addition to parents, not instead of them.

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2009
Thu, 03-29-2012 - 10:31am

Have you experienced this before? a Step from the other side telling you that you can't do easter with your children? this does seem WAY over stepping.... the only thing i would think would happen would be that perhaps the step would do things with her hersband (i.e. your ex) with his children... i guess there are some steps that are that much over bearing, that they would attempt to tell the BM that she can't celebrate Easter with her children... steps like this give a bad name to steps everywhere.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
Thu, 03-29-2012 - 11:15am
Nope. My kids don't have a step. And I don't think much would change if they did.

But...if ex lost his mind and wanted to change things, I would not give up baskets and stockings and birthday parties. At this point, my kids would find it pretty bizarre for someone to come in and try to duplicate that.

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2009
Thu, 03-29-2012 - 11:33am

perhaps it is the fact that they spend so little time at dad's house, so they really don't need anything there. But my kids spend EOWE at dad's and I don't send anything of theirs here to dad's, that way he doesn't have to keep track of it until they get back. and I don't let ANYTHING from BM's house come into mine, because i don't want to face the drama of "where's my squinky" when SD leaves... incase you don't know what a squinky is, it is aboutthe size of a pencil eraser and squishy.... so this is why we do separate birthdays and holidays... this and BM is crazy and i don't want to spend ANYTIME with her that is not 100% necessary, and DH doesn't either. and I encourage my kids to have a relationship with their father with out my supervision

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
Thu, 03-29-2012 - 11:47am
My children have a relationship with their dad that doesn't include me needing to supervise as well. I'm not sure why you feel the need to insinuate otherwise.

My children also used to spend extensive time with ex. Every other weekend and holiday plus all of the summer. Didn't change anything. Our kids things are theirs. They go back and forth as they choose.

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2009
Thu, 03-29-2012 - 2:59pm

they way you talk about most visits consisting of him coming to dinner with you to see them, or having to spend the night, or the fact that you have all holidays with him at your house, the fact that they are in a excessive amount of sports and are unable to see father very much due to them including his weekends AND holidays, and they always have been;

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2002
Thu, 03-29-2012 - 3:41pm
Or it is what you assume due to your extreme negative view of BMs.

My children's father is highly involved in their lives. As they have aged, the "schedule" has evolved to facilitate THEIR interests and activities, as well as his move away.

I don't "supervise" anything. sometimes I'm there, sometimes not. sometimes, he simply needs a place to stay when in town. Or, we go grab dinner after a kids activity. There's no need for me to control anything.

I have never said all their holidays are at my house. that would be false. I have never said my kids are in excessive sports. I have never said I have to be there for our kids to see him. again, that's your warped view.

Okmrsmommy-36, CPmom to DD-16 and DS-14

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