SS manipulation?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2012
SS manipulation?
54
Sat, 03-24-2012 - 6:47pm

I know this isn't a support board, but I know that you ladies won't hold back... so give it to me... What do you think?

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2009
Wed, 04-11-2012 - 4:42pm

perhaps you should take him to a job fair, and let him see what is needed to get into the high paying jobs, find out if there is a way that he can talk to the a high ranking employee of your or

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2012
Wed, 04-11-2012 - 4:25pm

I would've thought he would see her b.s. before, but it seems to get worse. Yesterday, we got his report card. His grades have decreased for the third quarter in a row.

I'm starting to think that he's wanting to have a connection with his mom/brother (who is he close to) so he is "dumbing" himself down. His brother gets F's, SS has told me this. And his mom (no offense to anyone on here who fits this) has only her GED and will be working a dead end job for the rest of her life. She comes from trash (trailer parks, smoking while pregnant, deep south trash). It's sad, because he is ultimately affecting his future.

Anyway, I don't think his mom is thinking that she is hurting him, again I think she is too dumb to even realize it, but I think it is partly her fault, it's like she's egging it on... and putting little b.s statements in his head...

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2009
Mon, 04-09-2012 - 5:06pm

That is so sad when the parents of the child could treat their own children as pawns to a game. But i can see, and one day when SS is mature enough to look past all the glitz and glam his mother is feeding him, hopefully HE'LL be able to see how much you truly care for him

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2012
Mon, 04-09-2012 - 5:00pm

Yes very true... it's not an all end be end... it's up to the judge. But those are the criterias that would've had to be met for me to even try to persue adoption/termination of rights.

She would never or would've never gave up her rights. It's a game with her... who can win! She told me (in text message) that she wanted custody so she could get child support.... she's money hungry and it's deeply affecting SS.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2009
Mon, 04-09-2012 - 4:50pm

for you to adopt him, she has to give up her rights asa mother. AND to have her rights terminated TECHNICALLY she has to have no contact for 6months, but it is STILL up to the judge to be willing to terminate them... I had no contact from XH for YEAES on end, no CS no calls, no visitation... they STILL wouldn't terminate his rights... then he showed back up...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2012
Mon, 04-09-2012 - 4:46pm

Oh and the reason why BM's rights weren't terminated is there has to be zero contact for 6 months... she would call approximately every two or three months. And I could only adopt him if DH and I were married for a good amount of time... now, if we were able, I'd adopt him... but back then 1) I couldn't legally and 2) I didn't think she would ever come back and at the time, we thought that what DH had in writing (him having full custody) was it... we didn't know the process of family law. Now I have educated myself a bit about it...

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2009
Mon, 04-09-2012 - 9:28am

"Let me clear some things up: BM didn't abandon him like one would think. She fled to a different state without informing DH about it and tried to file for divorce and custody while not a resident of that said state. Because she did it illegally, DH automatically "won" custody of SS. During the 3 years that BM was living in her home

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2012
Sun, 04-08-2012 - 3:30am

Sorry, it's been a hectic week with school (finals) and work.

Let me clear some things up: BM didn't abandon him like one would think. She fled to a different state without informing DH about it and tried to file for divorce and custody while not a resident of that said state. Because she did it illegally, DH automatically "won" custody of SS. During the 3 years that BM was living in her home

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2005
Sat, 04-07-2012 - 3:17pm
lovemybabygirl11 wrote:

I have asked him before... and he always says "I don't know".... or nothing. When someone doesn't talk when you are asking questions, there's not much you can do.

I definitely think he is hurting and feels like if he loves/likes me then he's not being loyal.

I'm the BM of 3 adult dd's, but he needs consoling. Can y'all get him into some? It may help

~~Sam stitches well with others, runs with scissors in her pocket. Cheerful and stupid.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2009
Fri, 04-06-2012 - 4:04pm

i find it funny that my reply has 25 views, but no comments

Pages