The Irony of it all.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2008
The Irony of it all.....
21
Wed, 05-06-2009 - 12:47pm

Curious at what thoughts are.


First the situation then the analogy.


Tonight on our news will be a story about a child (male) so allergic to soybeans and peanuts that the very smell of either could kill him.


Analogy:


You are a parent of a 6 y/o son. He is severely allergic to peanuts.

Rands

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2005
Wed, 05-06-2009 - 3:44pm

I would have to say the parent. In that situation, the child has a medical condition whereby he could die no matter where he goes, and I don't feel that the school should have to make provisions to accommodate this severely needy child. In our state, there's a website where kids can get the same education, using the same curriculum as the public schools. That would be an option, maybe all states should have that. Personally I want a better education for my kids than what the state government can provide so I don't use the free service but many homeschoolers do. Especially parents who are not comfortable teaching middle and high school subjects. The problem though, from what I understand, is that the homeschool kids are advanced if they are homeschooled all the way through elementary school and there are some issues with the school not allowing a 9th grader to take a 12th grade class. It's all about control and personal issues though - not about what's right. But then that's the way the government works in most cases. It makes no sense to me since I took 12th grade "Novel" as my 9th grade English class and 12th grade Algebra as my 9th grade Math. I did it because I hung out with older kids and wanted to be in class with them, which clearly should not be an acceptable reason for a child to take advance classes. However, if the child needs those advanced classes then I see no reason why they can't take what's appropriate without the need for all that bureaucracy.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2008
Thu, 05-14-2009 - 10:52am

This was a "hot topic debate" in my EC .. I say the parents of the allergic child are at fault. A parent cannot and should not expect that all other children would be sent to school without any peanut / soy products. Not to mention, why should every other child have to make that sacrifice because of one child's allergy? If the child is so allergic that just the smell of peanuts will send him/her into anaphylaxsis .. then that child does not belong anywhere that the food allergy could put that child at risk. Peanut butter is a great source nutrition for children who are not allergic .. I don't know if I would have made it through elementary school without a PB&J most every day of the week.

If a child has severe asthma and cannot run & play with the other kids on the playground at recess time and that child is kept indoors .. does that mean all the students should have to stay indoors because one student cannot tolerate it? Of course not.




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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2008
Thu, 05-14-2009 - 1:49pm

I'm glad you picked up on this. This was a two way thought process from the news report (which by the way, I did not watch, so I cannot attest to what actually happened and the scenario I gave truly was a hypothetical) also mixed in with the Law and Order series on "Selfish".


Personally, I think no one is at fault - and this is why....


With everything there is a risk - and with all those risks, a person needs to balance the risk

Rands

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2005
Thu, 05-14-2009 - 4:06pm

I think EC is "Expecting Club".

ITA with what you said "Personally, I think no one is at fault"

"And there are many times where no one is to blame for things that happen in life, regardless of the outcome. Something or someone doesn't always need to be blamed. "

Have you ever heard (or read) a doctor or scientist discuss blame in regards to an Autistic child and how he/she became autistic? On so many blogs and message boards all over the web I have read where they say things like "You just need someone or something to blame, bla bla , it's understandable, you just need a reason" as if having a *blame* or *reason* would even come close to putting the child back to the way he/she was...as if having something to blame would make all the physical, mental and financial difficulties suddenly easy. Nothing makes it easy, ever - and how dare them say such a thing to these parents!

I get so mad when they say that crap online - but then yesterday, I get to hear it in real life. This lady is telling about her baby's doctor visit and not wanting to vaccinate on the current schedule. Her doctor actually TOLD her that the reason "women" get the idea that vaccines caused the autism is because "it's human nature" to need something to blame it on. He ALSO told her something about emotions and "hormones" (YES, HE ACTUALLY SAID THE WORD)... I thought I would fall out of my chair listening to her tell this story! I just cannot believe how someone smart enough to go through med school is not smart enough to see the logic in the numbers.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2007
Thu, 05-14-2009 - 9:03pm

I don't have anything to add... I'm tired.

But I just have to tell you that your siggy makes me smile. Maybe because I remember you posting with the big belly shot... now we see this cute little guy and such, well... it's just warm and fuzzy.

*sigh*

Life is good.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2008
Thu, 05-14-2009 - 9:51pm

Aww.. thanks!! :) .. Wow.. that big belly, I didn't realize how big it was, until after I had him and then I looked back at pictures. I took a pic 2 days before they induced me for Pre E .. I'm glad I got that last "huge" picture!

He makes me all warm and fuzzy every time I look at him. Nothing could be more perfect.




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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2007
Thu, 05-14-2009 - 11:03pm

<<>>

I'm kinda partial to pregnant bellies, and yours was awfully pretty. While I miss seeing it in your siggy, it's been replaced with the most perfect little smile... geez... too cute.

Hugs mama, congrats.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2008
Fri, 05-15-2009 - 12:45pm

Let me also throw this out on the flip side.

Rands

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2005
Fri, 05-15-2009 - 1:42pm

I remember hearing about a family who was upset with their church because one of their children was not allowed to attend services. He was autistic and very disruptive (not all autistic children are).

It's sorta along the same lines. The family does have a right to worship in the church, they've been members there throughout their kids lives.

When I heard this, I thought to myself "What's next, Autism classrooms in the church?". But in reality, it may not be such a bad idea if larger church's created classes just for those kids, we know there's lots of 'um and more to come (more vaccines to add to the schedule). On the other hand though, many of those children are better off in small environments and don't fare well in crowds, they don't wish to be in crowds or hear loud noises. And many parent's don't want the label which becomes attached to the children who attend special-needs classrooms.

Speaking from personal experience, my childhood came with lot's of "no's" when it came to social environments where my brother could be harmed or we required both my parents for safety reasons but working kept them from attending so I didn't get to go either. A special needs child does create challenges, the rest of the world shouldn't be forced to make accommodations. Just my personal opinion :). Having a child with special needs will always require the family to sacrifice. Not being able to attend the public school system is not a problem if the school has online classrooms. I guess it's why they mainstream the severely autistic kids now. When my brother was young, he went to special schools, not regular schools. He felt more comfortable there, with kids like him. He enjoyed the small classrooms because many of these kids don't like crowds. But then, you have those who are autistic who NEED the social environment of a crowded classroom and they NEED the interaction with the neuro-typical kids. So, just like in medicine, schools try to force the *one size fits all* standards and just like in medicine, it doesn't work for everyone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2008
Fri, 05-15-2009 - 2:43pm

Okay - so now, let's look at it from a vaccine standpoint.

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