2 questions concerning post C/S delivery

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2003
2 questions concerning post C/S delivery
2
Tue, 06-10-2003 - 5:36pm
I had C/S June 3 after 16 hrs of labor that failed to progress, and my DS heart rate kept dropping below 60 for minutes at a time. I had been induced after my water broke, as I was Group B strep positive and my contractions weren't doing anything useful. It was scary to see his heart rate drop, and was actually relieved at the time to have the C/S as I knew he would be safe then. Turns out his cord was wrapped around his neck and hadn't moved into position very well.

It was my first pregnancy, and I was open to epidural, and my first question has to do with back pain after epidural. they had to give me the epidural twice as the first try went into a vessel and they needed a to try a new location to get it right. The most bothersome pain I have had since the C/S has been a bachache. I am also breatfeeding and can't tell if my backache is from not getting into a good position to feed, or possibly from the epidural. Does anyone have thoughts on post epidural back pain?

Second question- maybe more of a vent- the more I look back on the delivery the more I feel like I missed out on the birth. It seemed too easy, as if I cheated or something, (even though the 16 hours labor was definatly not easy). I really had very little pain from the c/s itself. In fact, I never took pain meds except for a little Ibuprophen. I almost feel if I had felt physically worse, I'd feel more like I actually delivered. I'm sure I should be thankful that it went so well and was so comfortable. I was out of bed in 14 hours, was eating by 16, and had staples removed day 3. I feel crazy, I have a wonderful son sitting here, but it is almost as if he was just dropped off with me, I wish I felt like I had more of a birth expierance. Has wnyone else felt like they "cheated"?

Thanks for your thoughts.

Linda

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2003
Wed, 06-11-2003 - 10:43am
Linda, I'm so sorry you didn't have the delivery you had anticipated. It can be very disappointing to have a csxn when you are expecting a natural birth. After my first csxn, I felt very cheated and was somewhat depressed. However, when I became pregnant with my second child I *chose* to have another csxn instead of attempting to do a VBAC. Because I felt like the delivery was in my control, it was a totally different experience and I never once doubted my decision.

I am now pregnant with my 3rd and will be having a 3rd csxn in a few weeks. Again, it's no big deal to me this time - csxns are now all I know and are "natural" birth for me. However, I do remember how I felt after the first and I was disappointed, and yes, it is normal to feel that way. Allow yourself to grieve for the birth experience you missed, but a wise person told me following the disappointing delivery of my first that "pregnancy is not about the birth experience, but about having a baby." I'm sure as your precious baby grows, how he/she got here will become less painful and you will revel more in the milestones of your little one.

Big Hugs, Stephanie edd 7/22

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-1997
Wed, 06-11-2003 - 4:36pm
"Some people need help getting pregnant. Some people need help staying pregnant. You just seem to need help getting unpregnant." Credit to my best friend, Rebecca.

She lost a baby at 5 wks. Five yrs later conceived (with help) but lost her DD at 20 wks. Had a surprise baby but lost it at 5 wks. She finally got pregnant again and delivered a healthy baby boy--14 wks early by c/s.

Please do not think I am belittling your experience. I have been there. In fact, as I read your story I felt I was reading my story from 5 yrs ago. I went into labor with a bang (SROM) right at 40 wks (3 days early/late depending on whose dates ya used). I labored overnight with no major changes. I had pit for 12+ hrs because I too was GBS+. I never dilated past 3-4 cm (what in the heck is wrong with my body????????) even with all that pit. No epidural problems though. When Hannah was born her cord was around her neck as well. She never dropped either; her head was molding at -1 station, apparently that was a good sign she wasn't going to fit. So 24 hrs after my water broke she was born and it went in my charts as SROM, GBS+, FTP and CPD. Initially I was fine but as time went on I felt worse and worse and worse about it all. Couldn't tell the story of her birth without crying. I should have gotten help but didn't. I vowed my next would be a VBAC.

As I was adamantly saying I wanted VBAC, my friend made the statement above. At the time I though, what does she know?

When the time came for #2 I ended up going for a c/s for a number of reasons, many of which look silly on paper now. We knew Emmi was bigger than Hannah (dr and I both felt that way--u/s confirmed). Nothing was happening to suggest that labor would start on it's on and we had *nothing* to make us think VBAC could be successful. My sister was in the midst of chemo for a rare cancer so my family was pretty wrapped up with her. It ended up making sense to just schedule a c/s. Emmi was a 10 lb babe so in 1 sense I think we did the right thing. But I do wonder sometimes. . . .

My 2nd c/s was so different from my first. After #1 I was up and showered within 10 hrs and eating real food at the same time. No nausea, basically pain-free. What a fluke. After #2 I didn't get up or showered until close to 18 hrs later but did start eating real food about that time. But I was in much more pain, a problem I blame on the understaffed unit (never could get pain meds on time in that hospital).

Long way around. . .your feelings are valid. You need to give yourself time to grieve the birth you didn't get.

Don't buy into that "you have a healthy baby and that's all the matters" garbage. Mom must be healthy too and your health involves your mental, emotional and spiritual health. Give yourself time. I bet eventually you'll be able to buy into my best friend's quote as well.

Oh, and the back pain--I'd bet it's a nursing issue. I seem to remember that cropping up from time to time after both my girls

(((hugs)))

Julie (email me any time!!!)