Had breakfast with the girls today, and the subject of marriage came up...

Avatar for sabrtooth
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-1999
Had breakfast with the girls today, and the subject of marriage came up...
5
Thu, 01-05-2012 - 9:03pm

since dd#2 is due to pop any minute, but states emphatically she and he have NO desire to marry.

Avatar for elc11
Community Leader
Registered: 06-16-1998

Neither of my kids have expressed any plans to marry, but neither have ruled it out either.

Dd25 has been unofficially engaged twice, the more recent engagement ending about a year ago. The first guy was clearly wrong for her in so many ways, it just took her a while to figure that out. The second one seemed like a good match and we really liked him a lot. I actually have never heard exactly "what went wrong" but she broke it off and hasn't been in a serious relationship since, although she would welcome it if she meets the right guy. (I think part of the problem with the ex was that

Avatar for deenow17
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2004
Great question Sam, I have been married to Ian for almost 37 years and only my youngest ds has been really interested in marriage. He and his fiancee are to be married in 2013 but we are hoping they delay it a bit as they are young (ds 25 & she is 21).

dd & sil were together for 8 yrs before they got married this summer when dgs was 4. She had no desire to get married & has refused to change her name. They were engaged for 4 yrs & she would have been happy to stay that way. She just said she didn't need a piece of paper. sil on the other hand wanted marriage but now that it happened, I think it was more for the party.

Eldest ds has no interest in marriage, says there is nothing positive about it and while he has had a few serious relationships, they never last for more than a yr as his expectations are too high in my opinion. He seems to have plenty of friends with benefits which is something I'm not a fan of but hey, he is 29 & doesn't live at home so it's not my place to challenge his lifestyle.

Sometimes I think people just aren't realistic about marriage. I know there were times when I would love left but thankfully, these were few & far between. We just worked out the problems cause we realized that marriage takes work.

One friend in her early 30s recently divorced after less than 2 yrs. She just loves her ex but hey, it was too hard & they are better apart. My sil married at 30 & was separated before her 1st anniversary. She as well loved her ex but it was more of a brotherly love than romantic. Both of these women are well educated, successful career women who I would have said were mature but their reasons for splitting make marriage seem trivial. sil waited almost 10 yrs until she found someone else before she got her divorce.

Dee
Avatar for suzyk2118
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-1997
DS19 plans to marry and have kids, assumedly in that order - I'd like to think he and his steady gf will wait til they're done with school (him with a master's and she wants to be an NP). We'll see...

Sue
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2009
DS23, although she has a steady b/f, has no plans to get married and have kids. She wants to finish grad school, work, travel etc.. before hand. And the marriage will come first. DS21 doesn't have a steady g/f. I suspect he will be in his 30s before he gets married after he finishes grad school, works for awhile etc.. There is no hurry.
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Registered: 08-22-2009