I think telling her to wait was a good idea--especially because she was going to spend the money herself.
We reached that point with our kids too, Dee. They felt that what they wanted, they could buy themselves. And that even the magazine subscriptions they said they wanted for a few years, they either tired of or decided they'd get for themselves. And to be perfectly honest-that's okay. All 3 of them have good jobs, lovely homes & need very little. I buy Christmas gifts for everyone-I save Birthday gifts for the grandchildren. And that seems to be okay with everyone.
I usually find a special card, & make the phonecall to the birthday person (don't sing though-that would make it an obscene phonecall!)& done. They all buy for their little brother, & I do believe they still buy for their neices & nephews. It works well for Mike & I-not only do they live far enough away that we can't always see what they have or need-but he is retired & bigger gifts are expensive.