When did we get so stupid?

Avatar for deenow17
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2004
When did we get so stupid?
3
Sat, 01-22-2011 - 4:13pm

Thought I would kick this new folder off with something that a couple of friends and I have been discussing this week. We are all in our 50s, with kids between 24 & 35 and grandkids under 4. We also worked full time while raising these kids during a time where a father was considered wonderful if he helped in the home.

During the last few weeks, we have all experienced the same reaction from our kids when we foolishly offered advice regarding their kids or lives. In my case, my grandson started running a temperature without cold symptoms for 2 days. Then the runny nose & coughing started. The temp was up & down for 5 days. I suggested seeing a doctor, reaction was it's a waste of time Mom as it's just the flu. We were to baby-sit overnight. No problem but I said that they had to take my grandson to the walk in clinic before dropping him off with us. They reluctantly complied & the poor kid had severe infections in both ears. My DD feels awful now but said she asked him several times if his ears hurt & he said no. Apparently, I ran to the dr too much with my kids which is interesting in that I don't remember ever being there & not having the dr confirm that they needed tests, drugs, etc.. Plus we didn't get to take time off work to deal with family issues. You had to take a vacation day or lie & call in sick yourself. In our province, an employer must give you up to 10 days per year to deal with family illness & most companies pay you for it.

Similar thing happened to my girlfriend, her little grandson had been coughing for weeks & her daughter did take him to the dr but was told his lungs were clear but he didn't get better & her DD said it was a waste of time to take him back. 3 wks later my girlfriend demanded that her daughter take him back to the dr because he was getting worse and turns out this little one had pneumonia.

My other girlfriend cautioned her son about quitting his job before he confirmed that he had a firm offer for another job. He had the verbal but nothing in writing. He knew better & quit. Unfortunately, the company results weren't as good as forecasted & they are now in a hiring freeze. So he didn't get a formal offer & he is without a job, no benefits & his wife only working part time.

These are a few examples of how wonderful kids can still create frustration for us as parents even when they are "grown kids". Anyone else get frustrated with their frown kids & wish you could still send them to their room? Any other examples of how little we know & how much they know?

Have a good day, Dee.

Avatar for elc11
Community Leader
Registered: 06-16-1998
Sat, 01-22-2011 - 9:54pm

I seem to be in-between bouts of stupidity LOL probably because I don't have any grandchildren yet. When my kids were teens I didn't know anything but when they hit their 20s I started getting smarter. I'm enjoying the lull as I will surely lose all of my wisdom again.

I do know what you are talking about Dee, I saw it firsthand with my niece. On Christmas night 2009 she and her dh and 2 little girls were here for dinner, along with my SIL her mom. SIL picked up the 2yo by the wrist and immediately 2yo started screaming. SIL and I checked out 2yo and nothing appeared to be broken or dislocated so we advised distracting the child to get her calmed down and see if it would pass. Niece and her dh wouldn't hear of it, they had to rush her to the ER. On Christmas night. When they finally returned 5 hours later (having missed dinner I will add) the diagnosis was that nothing was wrong with her arm. SIL and I can't figure out how we managed to raise our kids to adulthood since we know nothing about assessing injuries in children!

Avatar for deenow17
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2004
Sat, 01-22-2011 - 10:47pm
I wonder when they will stop trying to get a reaction out of us. Poor little kitty, hope he scratches your ds to teach him a lesson! My youngest DS does the same thing with my poor dog. She will be asleep somewhere & he will bring her to me & drop her on me just to drive us both crazy.

Yes, I remember that in between stage, well. I actually thought I had gained back some of my brain power lost during the teen years! My dd did ask for my opinion on her house purchase, her job situation & her relationship with her SO. But I'm dumb when it comes to raising kids. Go figure! Somehow though, I had my grandson when he got sick during his 1st 18 mths, he survived & never needed I dr. I used to think DD was able to sense when he was getting sick & then ask me to babysit. My DD seemed to forget those occasions. lol
Avatar for deenow17
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2004
Sat, 01-22-2011 - 10:55pm
I just realized why your kitty picture was so familiar. We both used to be on the AIK board lead by John. I missed that board over the last few years. It was such a help during the years my kids were in their early 20s.

Dee