School, children and scared new dad,HELP
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School, children and scared new dad,HELP
| Sun, 12-10-2006 - 12:51pm |
Hello All,
I'm new here and hope you will have some good advice for me. I am married to a wonderful man, have a 7 year old son and am expecting my second (husbands first) child in Feb. Oh, did I also mention I am in my second year at College to become a teacher. Well, my problem is, since this is my husbands first chld he is absolutely frightened at the thought of being left alone with a newborn while I go to some night classes. I don't know what to tell him to make him feel better or to waylay my fears of him not being able to cope. HELP!!!!!
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Hi and welcome! Congrats on expecting #2! Do you have any friends that have infants that DH could watch as a trial run? If not, I would suggest after the baby is born to leave him with the baby for small increments of time to build his confidence. And even when you are home in the beginning let him be "in charge" of the baby during the time that you will be at school so he and the baby get their own routine going before he's left alone with him/her.
Good luck!
Kathy
Well, first of all I want to say WELCOME and CONGRATULATIONS!!!!
I am JenB, mom 2 my 4 kids (see siggie), I have been married for 8 years, and I am currently attending a community college for nursing. I will be graduating in May of 2008.
I asked my husband what advice he would give a new dad, and the joker that he is said "Bottle up top, Flap down bottom"
But seriously, you just have to reassure him that he will do a good job, if I were you, I would feed the baby right before you leave, and are you only taking one class a night??? I would also write complete instructions for him on what he needs to do for every situation that you can think of.
Welcome to the board!
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Just like a previous poster said, make sure you feed the baby, change it's diaper and make sure everything is ready for dad before heading to class. Maybe he'll get lucky and the baby will sleep most of the time you are gone. Newborns tend to sleep a lot in the beginning so dad may get a few weeks to adjust to his new role. I say if dad keeps the baby dry, fed, warm & loved, he should do just fine! I would definetely get him to read a good baby/parenting book and you can usually borrow baby care videos from your local library. You can also look into taking a basic newborn care class together. Also if there is a relative/friend who can assist him for the first few days, that might help him too. It is nerve-wracking at first (especially for a man) but he will get the hang of it and figure out his baby real quick! I would just keep reassuring him in the meantime!
As far as Terrible 2's go, I can tell you that it doesn't last forever!!! Like the PP said, Terrible 2's really do start at 18 months! With my ds, that was the case anyhow....1 WHOLE year later, I am happy to say that his temper is really under control....for the most part! Now that he can express himself a lot more, he is behaving much better. My ds is REAL strong-willed and independent so we have dealt with our fair share of terrible 2's but what I found that made his behavior worse was when he was tired, hungry or bored so if I made sure to avoid him from reaching that point, we didn't have as many tantrums and everything else that comes with the Terrible 2 behavior. I took a parenting class for toddlers through a local non-profit organization where I live and they provided me with a lot of great ideas on how to control their behavior, Terrible 2's and such. You should see if anything like that is offered in your area. Feel free to contact me directly if you have any specific behavior you are trying to work on (tantrums, sharing, etc) and maybe I can provide you with some ideas! Good luck but hang in there...it does get better!