Child Support and my frusturation with the state

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-22-2004
Child Support and my frusturation with the state
4
Fri, 11-02-2012 - 12:19pm

Hi - I am new to this board and sought it out because I am SO FRUSTURATED and wanted to talk to some other single parents about their struggle in obtaining child support!  My daughter's father is over $22,000 behind.  No, he has never been arrested.  No, he has never been brought to court for contempt.  No, his license is not suspended.  He is not being held accountable in ANY way and I am so sick of fighting with the state to get money that I was awarded to raise OUR daughter!  He has not made a payment since 2008 and they are not doing ANYTHING to help me.  He is unemployed so I am not asking that they garnish his wages.  If he was working, they would,  because that would be easy.  I am asking for them to make him answer to a judge on why he is skirting his obligation.  Every time I call my case worker all I receive is attitude which has made me so uncomfortable, I dont want to call her anymore.  But she doesnt do anything! 

So............I am wondering if getting a lawyer involved would do anything to help me.  Has anyone else struggled like this?  Thanks for any advice that you have.  We were divorced in 2008 and he has paid maybe $300.00 since then.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2012

I know exactly how you feel,I was divorced in 98 and my childs father was ordeered to pay $65 a week ,she was almost 8 at the time,she is now going on 21 and he has never once paid it,since she has been out of my home he has given her money and I guess he sends her gifts and things for her son,but I also have a case open with DHS to collect the support and not one dime has ever been collected.He has worked under the table and not filed taxes so they can't even take that money.He also never lost his license,last year he had a stroke and now gets SSI and Social Security,I am trying to get that attached ,I have been told that all child support debt gets wiped out when someone is declared disabled...this is so unfair.I am also trying to find out if this is true and see if I can sue in small claims court.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2009
I would contact a lawyer, at least for a consultation. Most lawyers will do a free initial consultation. At the initial consultation, they'll listen to your story and let you know what your options are as well as what their fee would be. I'm sorry that your ex hasn't been living up to his obligations. Does he have visitation rights? Is he at least visiting with your daughter?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2005

I'm curious to know what state you live in.

I know the state of NY is the same way.  Unless you were on public assistance, they don't do much of anything to hold the other parent accountable. I haven't received a dime since 2007 and I'm supposed to be getting over $600/month. 

 I was told by someone to write a letter to the congressmen/women of the state.  Don't know how helpful it will be, but it's something that's worth a shot I guess.

Good luck to you!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2006

I don't know what state you live in as different states have different laws. But, i would definately contact an attorney at this point. The amount owed in CS is well over anything that you would spend on attorney's fees anyway. I am surprised that nothing has been done to this man yet. Horrible! No wonder he isn't jumping because no fire has been lit under his butt yet. And as far as the caseworker goes, unfortunately most of them get so comfortable in their jobs and so used to having to deal with countless amounts of CS cases a year that we become just a number to them. Needless to say, they aren't exactly going to jump fences for you because to them you are just another case and another file on the desk. Get a hold of an attorney and i wish you much luck!