Organizing day? Encouragement? Abroad?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2006
Organizing day? Encouragement? Abroad?
Thu, 05-22-2008 - 8:15am

I'm Tash and new to the board. I guess I'm looking for some words of advice and encouragement.

By way of background, my DS is 18 months and I am expecting for Sept. A baby girl. DH and I have lived abroad for 8 years and after my maternity leave was up with DS, I quit my job as a corporate lawyer to stay at home. DH works 12 hour days. I had worked in the field for 8 years and wasn't conflicted by my decision at all. I knew for many many years that I didn't want to continue the work travel, the multiple all nighters and being at my work's beck and call when I had children. I plan to go back to a different job/field when my kids are in school (or maybe part time in 4 or 5 years or so).

Perhaps my hormones are getting the best of me but I can't quite shake some negative feelings I've been having lately. I'm not sure where it's coming from since I have a small, but great group of english speaking SAHMs where I live, we have baby groups, meet at parks, have music classes, etc. It takes up some of the slack when you don't live near family or childhood friends, but it's not a replacement since we haven't known each other for long.

I have been feeling terribly guilty lately about my son, who is getting older now. I feel like since I left my professional life to be with him, I should get my act together and have a more structured day for him. More thought put into activities or perhaps a real plan about how to teach him, stimulate him. It used to be easier, but he is now seemingly a little bored by exploring the house, playing with his toys and listening to my stories.

To be fair, I guess, I had terrible nausea during my first trimester and have still been feeling tired and cranky up to now. I'm 22 weeks into my pregnancy. I still feel guilty about him though. Darn it.

Here are my specific questions:

How do you organize your days?
How much time do you spend doing chores? Do you only do them during the naps or otherwise?
How much actual planned, structured time would you spend educating, playing with your 18 month old?
How much time do you plan for yourself?
What do you do if you really feel tired and still have an 18 month old running around?

Thanks for your input. I should just suck it up and enjoy this time I'm sure. Just having one of those days.