anyone have kids 3 years apart?
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anyone have kids 3 years apart?
| Thu, 11-11-2004 - 4:33pm |
Hi!
I visited the OBGYN today and he said I was ovulating, and I would have a great chance of getting pregnant tonight! I have been thinking about another baby for a few months now, and can't come to a decision. I'm nervous and excited, but my husband and I know for usre we want at least one more child, if not 2 more.
I think we're going to try tonight just once and see what happens.
If I got pregnant this month, the baby would be born just a month before my son is 3. I've heard that 3 years apart is perfect, any opinions or feelings? thanks!
katie.
I visited the OBGYN today and he said I was ovulating, and I would have a great chance of getting pregnant tonight! I have been thinking about another baby for a few months now, and can't come to a decision. I'm nervous and excited, but my husband and I know for usre we want at least one more child, if not 2 more.
I think we're going to try tonight just once and see what happens.
If I got pregnant this month, the baby would be born just a month before my son is 3. I've heard that 3 years apart is perfect, any opinions or feelings? thanks!
katie.

That said, *for me* three years is a GREAT gap. My dd was five months shy of her 3rd birthday when ds came along and she gets along well with ds. REALLY well. People always remark on it. I think the temperments involved have a lot to do with that ... but I think it also helps that they are almost three years apart. If I have another child, he/she will be at least three years younger than ds.
I considered a few things when deciding ... I started later -- first pregnancy at 32. So if I wanted two or three kids I didn't have the luxury of a big gaps. DD was colicky and the first year was pretty harsh from delivery (c-scetion) to breastfeeding (I am fair skinned and the trouble I had with start up they don't teach you about in classes. My OB said she'd never seen anything like it -- black blisters after 24hrs. And neither of the two lactation people at the hospital could help me. Finally my OB's nurse, who had had similar problems, was able to rescue us) to surviving on no sleep with a colicky and then catnapping (until she was about a year old) baby and a husband who travelled a lot for work and no family or support alone in a new town. I needed time to recover after that! It took me a long time (about a year) to get pregnant the first time. So I thought it would take a while with number 2. I was shooting for that 3 year gap and we were shocked to find I was pregnant after the 2nd month of ttc! (I highly recommend charting) And finally, I also consider the advice of my favorite early child expert. He swears up an down that three years is *the* minimum gap you should have between kids. Of course, I'm no expert-groupie and I know lots of people that have closely spaced kids and did it deliberately and love it (though it does get hairy sometimes) so I'm not preaching this to anyone. And if I had wanted to space them sooner, this info wouldn't have stopped me. I'm just saying that for me, what I read seemed convincing and I factored it into my plans. And his persective seems to have been true for us -- based on my VERY LIMITED experience. You take the things you hear from other parents with big grains of salt because every family is so different amd what's true for me may or may nt come true for you. I learn that over and over in parenting.
Good luck to you. Having another is a blast. #2 was a lot easier for us, in almost every way.
PS In case you are interested the expert I mentioned is Burton White and the book that I like is called "How To Raise A Happy, Unspoiled Child." I have recommended him on these boards a few times before. Take him or leave him.
Cheers.
Edited 11/11/2004 6:57 pm ET ET by donachiara
good luck, and stick around to let us know what you decide!
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Whoa, thanks to everyone with all the responses! It helps SOO much to hear other people's opinions. :) I haven't decided for sure yet, I'll let ya know when I do!
Katie
Yes my kids are 3 years apart. I think it is a wonderful spacing. I hope that our next spacing can be 3 (maybe 4) years again...it's just really nice to have enjoyed so much of the younger years without being totally overwhelmed the two children with so many needs (under age 3 I mean). I think 3 years is perfect.
Rita
Rita